In Another Cycle
by LovelyDemon
Summary: "I've already waited ten years for you, I really don't see why one hundred would be a problem." Even in another world, Gilbert would always wait for Oz to return by his side. In this story, they should have lived the lives they deserved, but behind every corner lurked shadows, making it rather hard to believe that everyone the raven cared about lived a perfect life.
1. Gil: Angels and soulmates

**A.N: I do not own Pandora Hearts.**

 **Currently looking for a beta reader.**

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The problem with telling a story is; _how do you do it?_ This was something he realized as soon as he tried to write down his thoughts. There were a million things he wanted to say, yet he simply did not know how to start. It's easy, once you get the hang of it. Once the story has already begun, because then you know what else is coming.

While writing about the beginning is far more complex,

 _To be honest, I-_ he didn't even know why he was doing this. Gilbert knew that people did not call him weird for no reason, he knew just as much as them that those dreams he liked to believe were memories from another life, were just something his brain had made up.

There were no other worlds, no other life times linked to his and soulmates and angels, or whatever his mother had believed in did _not_ exist. When he thought about it like that, all he had to do was close his journal and pretend that everything he had written in them was just gibberish. There was absolutely no way that someone could even make a story out of this… _this…_ and yet-

But there is, there is one person who would understand.

This person was after all the whole reason why he even started to keep a journal. As soon as he could write, he had started to keep a journal. Because there were so many things he wanted to talk about once he got to meet _that person_ , and how could he ever ask the many questions he had been walking around for as long as he could remember, without knowing where to start?

Sure, he had enough journals piled up in his closet to tell _this person_ his whole life story, but not everything needed to be told. As much as he wanted _that person_ to catch up on all the stuff he missed, he didn't need to know _everything-_ ah!

Here he went again, writing about stuff no one understood but him. _That person_ did _not_ exist after all.

" _Big brother, I overheard the Regnard woman say you're insane."_ He remembered his younger brother had once told him this _._

" _Son, I think it's about time you'll get your head out of the clouds. You're a senior for Christ's sake. Focus on school instead of this person that doesn't exist."_ His father had scolded him on his first day of school.

And then there was his mom, he didn't even know why, of all things she had told him, this was the thing that came up to him, _"I do not believe in god… but I do believe in-"_ Angels. What that quote had to do with what he wanted to write down made absolutely no sense at all. Nothing made sense!

He wanted to scratch down the first sentences of that page and start over again but stopped himself. His mother believed in soulmates and angels. And before she died because of the cancer inside her lungs, she had always told him to find _this person_ her son always spoke of.

" _I do not believe in god, Gilbert. But I do believe in angels. I believe there's a little piece of angel in every one of us… and when I listen to you talking about this person you always dream of, I'm almost certain that they're much more angel then anybody else._ "

How do you recognize an angel, you may ask? " _Well, first of all: they are_ **loyal** _, they are also_ **selfless** _, but also_ **strong** _,_ **kind** _,_ **pure** _and_ **innocent** _."_ Then again, his mother's whole world revolved around pretty words. She was a writer, a poet, and an artist. He was more then certain that she had wanted to end her life the same way she ended her stories; with pretty words and a smile.

Perhaps he should just write everything down the way his mother would do it; his words would not be meant for the eyes of one person, but for those of many others. Instead of filling his journals with letters to a person he had made up in his head, he should explain who he was to everyone willing to listen.

It certainly made writing a lot easier.

So here it goes.

 _Hello, my name is Gilbert-_ … it sounded lame, he knew that. The raven was about to start over but then decided to let it stay. He could look for an opening sentence later. He just needed to write _this_ down before father would come upstairs and see the light was still on in his room. Even though tomorrow was another school day.

 _For as long as I lived,_ _I…_ believed that there is more then the eye can tell. _I believe that_ there are other world as well, some of them not that different as ours, others completely different. _Why do I believe this?_ Well, _in my_ school's library there is this whole section of books without an author. No one knows who wrote those stories, but they're everywhere. Spread around the whole world.

Some say; you can't get rid of those books. _No, it's true!_ People tried throwing them away, only to find them back in front of their doorstep. Those books choose where they want to stay; some people who've read them even say they recognize the stories. As if they truly happened.

There are worlds linked to ours, _they're not quite worlds actually_ , they are stories. And every time you die in one story, you get born again in another.

 _I know I'm not making much sense; even I have trouble believing it. But this is what I believe in, because you see…_ while Gilbert hasn't found what story he was part of; he does remember the person who always remained by his side in that story, _in another world_.

 _At least, that's what I like to believe_.

He knew that no matter what happened they would always find each other, _were it ten years… or even hundred. I'm used to waiting. Besides, that person said so them self,_ "Then this is not goodbye, _see you, Gilbert_."

 _But we got separated, even though I waited and waited and we reunited once again… something went wrong, and I… I need to find them_.

His family knew of this person he always dreamt of, they knew what he believed in. While his younger brother fully supported him, he did not believe him. His parents had let him believe in his fantasy, this of course changed when his mother got ill.

His mother was a writer who, no matter what, always knew how to turn the world into a much prettier place then it originally was. They had lived on clouds thanks to her; she had been the one that made their life a living fantasy. So that when she passed away, they crashed straight into a wall called reality.

Causing Gilbert to grow up faster then any other child his age should, suddenly he had to take care of his younger brother. His father could not bear to live with this reality. He tried to recreate the fantasy his wife had written down for them by drinking the reality away. With every gulp of alcohol he took, the world became less sharp. Everything turned beautiful once again…

This of course didn't last too long, Gilbert told himself. After only a year, the man got out of it. Once he overheard his eldest son scolding his younger sibling for staying up too late once again and not paying attention to his grades.

He had scolded his brother like a parent should.

Both siblings still had the image burned in their mind; the way their father had collapsed on his knees in front of them and begged for their forgiveness. He promised to be a better father and to never abandon them ever again.

He has since then, kept his promise. And not once, has he touched alcohol again. His father also did not allow fantasy to ever enter their house again. From now on, nothing would get his feet off the ground.

Which meant of course, _"No more talking about this person from another story. It is time you grow up and focus on your grades._ "

There was one person who believed in his theory, though. His childhood friend Kevin had listened to his story. Of course the last time he talked to Kevin was years ago, when they were still kids.

" _Sometimes, I feel like I don't belong here either… as if, those people were not meant to be my family."_ Kevin had told him,

" _That's why they beat him up_!" Vincent had shouted when he had overheard his brother mentioning this to their mother.

" _Vincent, don't be so rude_!"

Gilbert had been too young to realize that the bruises on his friend's pale skin had been from psychical abuse, that the reason why he always looked so tired wasn't because he had bad health. It was because he didn't get treated right by his parents.

Too young too realize that they didn't move out because mister Regnard found a better job, but because the police burst into their house and caught them red-handed abusing their child while drunk and god knows what else.

 _The thing is though_ … He always had the feeling that he and Kevin had been friends in another universe as well. But only, Kevin was different. He wasn't this timid and moody little guy that broke down every time you asked if he was alright, he was this strong cocky guy that always walked around with pride and knew how to get under everyone's skin.

 _One of the reasons why I can't help but believe that am not making this is up_ is because he met him again. When he changed schools, Vincent had gotten in too much trouble in their other one and because of this, no teacher took the two siblings serious anymore. They needed to start over once again in this school.

And thus, this time, he and Kevin reunited on the first day of school.

Kevin had changed, not just in appearance but also his name. He no longer went by the name Kevin Regnard but instead called himself Xerxes Break.

 _Perhaps I'm_ rushing into things. There were just too many things he wanted to write about. So many things needed to be said…

He wanted to talk about talking with Break for the first time, how happy he was to see Break had been accepted into someone else's family. He was now an older brother, his younger sister just turned seventeen who had just become a junior.

" _It means I'm almost done with school! Isn't that exciting?"_

 _I don't know why…_ but the more people he met, the more this feeling of excitement started to grow inside of him. He felt like a child on the night before going to an amusement park. Because sometimes he- _I_ knew it wouldn't take long anymore before he met _that person_. Even though he told himself that this person did not exist. The feeling of nostalgia he had whenever he hung out with Break, Sharon and Reim meant nothing at all and there was no way that the twins Vincent likes to hang out with are familiar.

 _Perhaps I should explain myself_ , Reim, _as you might wonder_ ; is an old childhood friend of Sharon. It is rumored that he has been crushing on her for as long as anyone could remember. But as soon as Break entered their lives, it seemed as if suddenly all the girl's attention had gone to her older brother and no one else. She knew his previous life wasn't something to brag about, even though no one told her anything about it. She could only guess. Sharon had made the silent promise to herself that no matter what happened, Break should always remain happy.

So it wasn't odd to see Reim and Gilbert talking alone in the hallway without the siblings around. Sharon probably accompanied her brother to a quiet place where he could nap and so that she could wake him up in time.

Then there were the twins, Echo and Zwei. _I have this feeling that this person always knows who everyone is, and yet…_ things are different then our different lives, so he needed to catch up on everything he had missed, right?

 _If you are even real._

He looked at his last sentence, only for him to write it again, this time the way his father wanted; _if that person is even real_. For this was not a letter to that person… Right!

With that in mind, he continued his writing, even though he wanted nothing more then to believe _that person_ existed, he still kept telling himself that _he_ was a childhood illusion he needed to get rid off.

* * *

Until that feeling of excitement had reached its peak. He couldn't sit still for two seconds, the whole day he felt like at some point, someone would jump out of a closet and shout 'surprise'. Perhaps wish him a happy unbirthday? It sure sounded lovely.

Yet, as the day went by like any other regular day, that feeling changed into something dark and heavy. Disappointment had found itself a way inside his stomach, slowly curling around in its nest to make itself comfortable.

 _Perhaps in another life, this was the day we met._ He had allowed himself to think like this.

Break had been the first to notice his sudden mood swing, he had joked about it and asked if perhaps his high school crush had just rejected him.

"Break, you shouldn't tease Gilbert like that!" Sharon had scolded him, those words had not even left her mouth before she turned her gaze back on him and asked if it was true. "Oh do tell me you found someone special?" always the romantic. He found himself thinking, _never change, Sharon._ No matter what life, the Rainsworth girl would always remain true to herself.

And that's when Reim brought up the school newspaper, "Have you perhaps found a picture of you in it that wasn't all that pretty? Don't worry in that case," he nodded towards their albino friend who had been sucking on a lollypop coming out of his many mystery pockets. "Break doesn't even have a nice side for on the camera."

"How meaaan." Break whined from his seat on the stairs, their school was old and large. Many classrooms didn't even get used, the stairs they had been sitting on at that time led towards the forbidden 3rd floor, so no one had any reason to use them. Which meant they could sit here as long as they'd like without getting in anyone's way.

"I'll have you know that that brat is taking those pictures on purpose." The hatter then started to defend himself while he kept pouting, _honestly,_ if it weren't for Gilbert knowing his past, he had probably believed what everyone else thought of him. _"The reason why he got held back twice is because the teachers didn't think he was mature enough_." Not to mention that, even though Xerxes was probably one of the smartest guys Gil ever met, he was lazy. He never turned in his homework in time and when was the last time he even brought a book to class?

Sharon was worried he had to do his year over once again if he kept it up like this.

"I'm sure he doesn't do it on purpose. I mean, as far as I know he never took a bad picture of me." Sharon had giggled.

None of the three other males in the girl's presence dared to speak their thoughts out loud, but with just one glance to each other, _they knew_ they shared the same thought. _Even the photographer is scared of what will happen if he puts a terrible picture of Sharon Rainsworth in the school's newspaper._ Sharon just laughed like the cute and _innocent_ girl she was.

Break, even though his poor health and rather weak appearance was known for being one of the strongest students in Latodwidge academy, and even he feared this cute and petite girl as much as anyone else, if not more since he lived under the same roof as her.

Perhaps one of the reasons why Sharon was the head of the student council was because no one dared to go against her will.

"I didn't even know we had a school newspaper to be honest." The raven then sighed, he still felt terrible for no reason at all.

"Well, I guess it's not unusual for you not to know. School only started four weeks ago…" Sharon then gave him a brief summary of how their school fully supports talent of all kinds. They had many clubs for their students were they could improve said talents.

But the most important of them all was the newspaper club, because they spoke of what all the others clubs did. The school photographer " _Once upon a time, there used to be a photography club, but something terrible happened and only one person remained_." Takes the pictures to put in the newspaper and then students would write about them. "We're so famous that we can even sell our newspapers!" the girl had proudly added. Her family had gone for centuries to this school, her grandma was even a proud sponsor, it was no wonder she knew a lot about this place.

"That's… actually impressive." He had admitted with big eyes, "Can I take a look?"

And suddenly that feeling of excitement had returned. He felt like a five-year-old opening his Christmas presents again. His hands were trembling once Reim handed him his copy of the school's newspaper. He said something about being able to buy your own copy at the club's classroom but the raven didn't even hear what he said.

His eyes scanned over the pages, hoping to find something. _Anything_ at all that could proof he wasn't going crazy, that years, and years of hoping had not been for naught. He _needed_ to know.

Yet as he read every page, word by word. There was nothing that caught his eye… his shoulders slumped and for the second time that day, he felt like someone had kicked him in the guts.

"T-the… pictures are pretty." He then mumbled, at least seeing a picture of Break flinching away from Sharon in the background cheered him up a little.

"Do you like them?" Sharon had sat down next to him so that she as well could gaze at some of the black and white pictures. "Oz's pictures are always so pretty you see, I remember when he-"

"S-sorry. Wh-what did you say?" he felt as if a jolt of electricity had gone right through him, that name she just said- it had woken him up once again. Every cell in his body just screamed _that's him!_ Oz, Oz… _Oz…_ he loved how the name sounded inside of his head.

Reim and Break had both looked up from whatever conversation they had just been having to see why Raven had suddenly raised his voice like that, they saw the enthusiasm in his eyes and could only be confused.

"T-the name you just said…." He had heard it; he didn't even know why he needed to ask her to repeat it.

"O-Oz? Why… have you met him perhaps?" Sharon glanced at her other two friends, perhaps she hoped for them to have some answers as to why their friend suddenly acted so weird.

"Y-yeah!" he lied, "There was something I-I needed to ask… could you tell me where he is right now?"

The girl blinked in confusion, "…W-well since it's club activities now he'll be at the newspaper club… but as soon as class starts again he'll be in his dark room _since_ … I'm not sure! I would have to ask Alice but he should be there."

As soon as he heard this information he got up, "Thanks Sharon!" he could just kiss the girl, if that wouldn't be completely out of character. So he just grabbed his stuff and ran off.

There was no way he could have explained it even to them, and even if he could, they wouldn't have understood. Their lunch break would soon be over; he didn't even care about skipping history if that meant he could meet the boy. _This is it_. The moment he had been waiting for his entire life. For as long as he could remember, he wanted to meet his soulmate from another story. He wanted to bring them home with him and introduce them to his parents. He wanted to proudly tell them that he found them. "This is him. The person I always dream about."

His mother would laugh and ask all sorts of question while his father would prepare some delicious meal for them. Vincent would probably glare at them from a distance; ask if Gil was sure this guy was the real deal.

" _Of course he is_!" he'd say.

Perhaps Vincent would accept him, perhaps he wouldn't. At some point, the raven had realized he didn't care: because he had _that person_ by his side.

There were so many things he wanted to tell him… _him_. Oz.

How had he not noticed before?

Sure this school was big, he thought while running through the long corridors. He almost bumped into someone while being so lost in thoughts.

"Watch where you're going stupid seaweed head!" the brunette shouted after him.

But how was it possible that they hadn't met not once, how many times had they walked past each other in the school hallways without noticing?

He slowed down as soon as he saw the door with the nametag "Dark Room" written on it. It was nearby the newspaper club, he had walked past this classroom so many times. Not once had he stopped to see what name was written on the tag.

 _School photographer Oz West_. "West?" it didn't sound right… no.

He felt scared all of sudden, for years he had created this image of the perfect boy inside of his head, this boy was like an angel and would have all the answers for him.

What if that person was nothing like he expected? Sure, Sharon and the others always gave off this feeling of nostalgia when he spoke to them, but that didn't mean everyone coming from that story was like that. _He could still have made it all up!_

He suddenly realized how irrational he acted. All this time he had been chasing a childhood illusion.

This was stupid.

" _Well,"_ a voice suddenly spoke from behind him, causing the teen to jump in surprise, as he slowly turned around he was greeted by a young boy, barely one year younger then him, "Are you going to knock on the door or what?" the blond haired beauty then asked with a mischievous smile on his face. He carried an old fashioned camera around his neck. He was dressed for the weather, the raven noticed. Wearing a beige sweater over a baby blue shirt, which had been buttoned all up, his jeans were dark blue and his boots brown.

An outfit the boy had chosen himself. _It looks like something he would wear…_

He realized he had been spacing out, the boy was still gazing at him with big eyes. The raven was lucky he was patient.

"A-ah! Sorry-… I-I have no actual business here. I- I just wanted…" _to know who you are._

The boy, _Oz_ just laughed and shrugged it off. He made a loose gesture as if to say he had to move aside. Of course Gilbert moved aside as fast as possible, hoping he was not being a bother.

"It's fine, y'know." The blond then said over his shoulder, out of his pockets he got a key, which he used to unlock the door. _Wow,_ the raven had thought. You must be a real trustworthy person if you had your own personal room and _key_ to that room. Just imagining the school actually trusted someone like that was impressive. _Yet, it doesn't surprise me if this person is Oz._

The photographer opened the door, "You're not the first person who wants to watch."

"…S-sorry?"

Oz threw his old leathered school bag over one of the many unused desks, together with the jacket he had been carrying while he headed straight towards the only window that had no curtains to block the light.

"You're here to watch me bring the pictures to life, am I right?" Oz asked over his shoulder, he gave Gilbert a curious look. "Or… am I wrong?" _that would be embarrassing!_ He must have thought.

"N-no! yeah, sorry… I-I just… thought it'd be more difficult to-to… c-con… convince you, y'see?" he offered a weak smile.

It seemed that his lie had not convinced Oz who now frowned at him, for a second Gilbert saw an emotion he could not name appear on the boy's face before he offered him a carefree grin.

"Then come on in. Close the door though, I can't have any light from outside enter the room." And with that, he closed the last curtain; darkness engulfed the room.

And all he could think about was; _this is it_. The moment he had been waiting for his whole life.

And that moment was shared with no one else but _Oz West_.

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 **Please leave a review.**


	2. Oz: Lost pictures

**A.N: This story is not a one-shot, as some as you might have thought. It'll have more chapters. The first chapter didn't even come near to the summary...  
Perhaps I should warn you so that I don't disappoint you or shock you later in the story,  
This story is very DARK, Bad things will happen. In this story, a few things will be appear: Boy x Boy (But that you already figured out) it'll be very slow build, Past abuse, rape/non-con (Only mentioned), violenece, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD for short), break downs, sexism, victim blaming, bullying, lying... etc. **

**For now it's rated T, but I might change it.**

 **Pairings will be:  
Oz x Echo (in the beginning)  
Gil x Oz (Very slow build)  
Vincent x Aida  
Sharon x Break (One sided. For now... I think.)  
Reim x Sharon (One sided. Still figuring that out.)**

 **This story will have a lot of OC's who will not play a huge part in this story, most of them being replacement parents for the characters. One OC will play a huge role, but he only shows up in the past. They will NOT dominate this story. _Because let's face it, y'all didn't show up here to read about some crappy OC's._ _Neither do I._**

 **I do not own Pandora Hearts.**

 **Leave a comment, it brightens my day and is what keeps me writing.**

 **Currently looking for a beta. **

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_-Something was missing._

 **Click. Click** _._ The flash on his camera went off. The boy gazed with a peaceful expression on his face. Birds flew away as soon as a soft October's breeze brought the trees back to live. Alice had turned her head as soon as she had noticed the flash; a grin appeared on her face when she saw the blond boy holding up his digital camera. The girl asked if she could look at the picture he had just taken, she already stood next to him before he could answer and leaned as close as possible without actually touching him so that she could look at the small screen.

 _-…Or was it someone?_

Alice talked about a TV series she had just started watching with her older sister, Lacie. It wasn't often that they got to spend some time together; so Oz understood how happy she must have been when Lacie agreed to watch it with her. She probably didn't even care about this series they started watching of fairytale characters coming alive in our world. He turned his flash off while the girl talked; her eyes were filled with childish happiness as she spoke. Her cheeks were red because of the cold weather, he remembered how Alice's older brother; Oswald had ordered her to at least put on a scarf now that it was getting colder again. Alice had refused, saying she didn't feel chilly at all.

"Look at Oz, he's dressed for the weather." Even though he had been scolding her, Oswald rarely raised his voice and almost always spoke in monotone. Alice had muttered something under her breath that sounded very much like, "That's because he's weak."

 _-The first time he had noticed the absence of presence of this person had been when he was four…_ _he remembered chasing a butterfly with Alice in the fields behind her house, at some point he had wanted to turn around and shout 'hurry up!' only to come to the realization there was no one behind him. Alice had been running in front of him, she had been faster then him. Then who…?_

"Can we stop for a snack?" Alice asked while pointing at a hot dog vendor. Of course, Oz rolled his eyes yet couldn't help but smile. His friend's nose had caught the scent of meat and now her stomach screamed for food.

It didn't even matter what his answer was, the girl had already run towards the man and ordered two hot dogs before Oz even had the time to open his mouth. He saw how the wind ruffled Alice's hair. She stood out, he noticed. Wearing her favorite red jacket against the grey colors of the buildings. _She always stood out_. He thought with a smile on his face.

 **Click. Click… _click_. **

He took another one when his childhood friend stood in front of him, already taking a bite of her food while holding the other one out towards him. Her eyes were big, like a five year old sucking on a lollypop. She looked pleased. _Look at me, eating a hot dog._ She seemed to want to say.

"Thank you." He smiled while accepting the warm food. Alice didn't comment on it, instead they continued their walk back towards their homes. She asked him how the pictures for that article about her basketball club had come out.

Alice had started playing basketball after the girls kept begging her to, they had seen her during P.E, she was fast and had a lot of stamina. She was good at almost any sport... a lot of clubs had requested for her to join them. But it had been the basketball club that won.

 _-He had started searching for whatever he had been missing, but looking for something he couldn't remember was hard. "Mom… dad, could you help me find something?"_

The pictures had come out great, he said. Aida had promised she would take a look at them; she was the head of the Newspaper club. The one that read everyone's articles before they got published and did all the finishing ups. She was probably the only person who actually took her job serious, instead of all the others who just did it for good grades. He liked Aida, she was always kind and never pushed him too hard to turn in his pictures in time. Not that he ever turned them in late… _but still_ , it was nice that she gave him space.

Aida had also been the one that took him under her wing on his first day of school two years ago, ever since that day the two had become rather good friends. It probably was because of them being so close and the resemblances of hair and eye colors that confused so many people into believing they were siblings. While the thought of the girl being a sister of him didn't strike him as odd or anything, he somehow could not imagine her as an older sister. _Even though her mature aura._ Aida always gave him this impression that he was missing something. Something important, yet he couldn't quite put a grasp on it.

 _-When he was seven, he decided he wanted to be a photographer. When his father had asked why he liked taking pictures so much, he had said because he liked to capture memories on those images. The truth was far more complicated though… "Because I want to continue what he couldn't." But who was he?_

"Echo also asked when you and the other two idiots will be performing again." Alice then asked out of the blue, she had probably just remembered her other friend had asked her to do this.

"You belong with those idiots as well, y'know." He had chuckled, Alice had already finished her food while Oz had only been halfway his.

The brunette had shrugged, "I never know when we're performing."

"That's because you never show up at our rehearsals." He scolded her, but still gave her the answer, "In two months, at the school's winter ball. Elliot also wanted to use one of his remixes, so you've gotta be at the rehearsal tomorrow." Good thing she reminded him of it, otherwise he would have probably forgotten to remind her of that. Which would lead to an angry Elliot and Leo sighing. He'd probably complain about nothing getting done at this rate. It was best he'd take Alice with him tomorrow, to safe his pride from getting hurt.

"Are we going to sing a duet?" she asked with a hopeful spark in her eyes, "It's been a while since we last did that."

"Ask Elliot, he's the one that chooses the music." He placed his hand on Alice's shoulder out of pure instinct when the light suddenly turned red, they had both not been paying attention to their surroundings.

"Oz. Did you just do an Oswald move on me?"

"I just realized!" he turned his head to face her, a bright smile on his face. "Didn't you just say Eko-chan asked after our next performance? Does that mean she's coming to watch?"

 _"_ You just realized that now?" Alice asked with a confused look, not quite sure what to think of her best friend's excitement.

 _-As he grew up, that feeling of missing something important only increased._

When the light turned green, they crossed the street, Alice had P.E together with Echo's class, it wasn't odd for the two to talk to each other. They had become great friends once the white haired girl had opened up to the her and the others. "Yeah, she sounded kind of excited even." She then said after thinking about it for a while. It wasn't often that Echo showed interest in anything really. So for her to actually ask such a thing was a huge character development.

"Oh! I could ask her if she wants to come to the rehearsal tomorrow!" Oz suggested, his smile never leaving his face.

The brunette gave a positive grunt as response, "I wonder what Oswald's cooking tonight."

When hearing this, the West gave his friend a slightly concerned look. "…Err… Alice. You just ate?"

"I'm _still_ hungry!" the girl puffed her cheeks.

 _-Until it reached a point of becoming unbearable._

"Oh yuk!" the girl then stuck out her tongue, "I just remembered." And she sounded truly heartbroken when she said this, "He wanted to make spaghetti." _Right. Alice did not like spaghetti._ Honestly, the male breathed out a chuckle. "Hey, Oz." she turned her head, her movements fast and without a warning. Causing some of the people who walked past them to give the girl and boy a second look.

Oz did not pay attention to those people, he had finally finished his snack and threw the paper away in a trashcan, "Hm?"

"Do you know what you're gonna eat?" Alice's voice was covered in innocence,

"Both my parents are out-"

"I'm not eating your food." The girl then stopped, she had a frown on her face. "Oz, you're a terrible cook. Don't invite me over. I'm not gonna show up."

The blond didn't even know if he should act heartbroken or cry, _auch._ That one actually hurt, in the end he tried to hide his flustered expression behind a scowl, "Actually… mom gave me some money to order take-out."

When hearing this, his friend's whole face lit up. "Can I come over? Can I come over?" she jumped up and down, her mind already wandered off to all the stuff they could order. There was a Chinese at the end of their street, a MacDonald's just around the corner, if Alice told him she wanted to go… well, Oz wouldn't mind, right? Because Oz knew just as much as her that he was a terrible cook, there was no way, kind Helen West would leave her son alone without money to order food.

"Hmmm…" the boy hummed while he tapped his chin, a thoughtful expression on his face. "I don't know. I mean… you actually hurt me when you said I couldn't cook."

Alice whined when hearing this, "Pleaseeee." She begged.

 _-He remembered that time he had scribbled something down on a post-it note, Photoshop had gotten stuck and as to keep himself busy, he had started drawing little doodles on them. At some point, his figures had changed into words… his eyes had widened once he read the all too familiar words..._

The Baskerville had already texted her sibling to tell him she would be staying at Oz's place, by simply sending a text that said 'Oz'. Not a minute later, her twin, Abyss had already send 'Ok' back. Oz and Alice basically grew up together. They had been friends for as long as both could remember. Sometimes they even referred to each other as their brother or sister. Since that was easier then explaining they were childhood friends that would under no circumstances _ever_ fall in love with each other. And yet, most people at their school were still convinced that they were a thing, judging by the amount of time the two spend together and how they were the only people allowed to enter each others personal space without the other one making a fuss about it.

Both Oz's and Alice's were used to seeing the other showing up uninvited on their front step.

 _-No matter what happens, I will always be by your side._  
 _"I don't believe in forever…" he had mumbled under his breath, he had furrowed his brow while glaring at the pink post-it note. Wondering to himself who had said this to him…_

Alice stayed over that night, she stole one of his pajamas and did not mind the fact at all that it was too big for her, they watched scary movies together, an empty box of pizza lay forgotten on his kitchen table as the two friends their eyes were glued to the screen.

.

By the time Peter and Helen West returned from a long day at work, they found the two having fallen asleep; with Alice using the blond haired male as her pillow once again. Well at least this time Oz didn't look uncomfortable while she did so.

They decided to let the two just stay like that, if they'd wake up later they could find Oz's room on their own, the two decided. Helen pecked her son's feather soft hair before she brushed a strand of hair behind the girl's ear.

 _-With every picture he took, he hoped to solve this mystery a bit more… piece by piece. Only, there was nowhere to start. Not a single piece lay before him._

The next morning, Alice put on some clothes that she had left at Oz's house. She had a special spot in his closet where she could put some stuff of hers. It wasn't the first time Helen suddenly found women's underwear in her laundry. Because of the cold weather, she put on one of her friend's sweaters instead of hers. His were always warmer, plus she liked the flowery scent Oz's clothes had. Everything in this house smelled nice, she had once said to the boy.

Oz had to protect his plate of breakfast from her greedy hands, otherwise there would have been no food left for him.

When the two finally headed off to school, they both had a bag with Helen's delicious food in them for lunch.

You could say that day started as any other regular day, as a matter of fact, the past week had been normal. Everything had been peaceful and calm, nothing unusual had happened.

Perhaps he should have seen it coming, now that he thought about it, it had been like the calm before a storm. _I should have known-_

 _-For some reason, he had always felt like… no matter what happened, someone would always stay by his side to support him. No matter what he did, he would always be proud of him and look up to him._

He had been talking with Aida when that feeling of loss had worsened, as if it no longer wanted to be something in the back of his head. Now it was standing right in front of him, shouting at him that he had to start searching, right now! _"Why are you talking so casually with this girl? SHE'S NOT IMPORTANT. HURRY, HURRY."_

"Are you alright, Oz? You look pale?" the blonde had asked, a concerned look in her eyes.

"I'm fine," he had sighed while asking details for his new project, he had seen the hesitation in Aida's eyes. She knew Oz long enough to know that no matter how hard she tried, he would keep repeating he was fine and refuse to tell her what was really troubling him. She knew that the best way of cheering him up was changing subjects so that he could get his mind off whatever was bothering him.

 _Perhaps that was also the reason, why… when_ **that** _happened, he had expected to be safe in this person's arms… instead, he had ended up empty handed... Oz had felt even more horrible when coming to this realization.  
-And god… does he remember what it felt like to have lost something so important that living without it almost sounds impossible, and yet, Oz couldn't even remember who or what had lost_.

He found what he was looking for in the hallways of his school, to say he had been surprised would be an understatement. Because what are the odds? It made you wonder; how many times had they walked past each other without noticing? Was he new? Did he perhaps appear as a background character in one of Oz's pictures?

He had felt relief wash over him as soon as his senior had turned around, he couldn't help but smile at the raven haired male as he tried to stutter out an explanation of why he was standing in front of the school's dark room.

Gilbert Raven. _Raven is an odd family name…._ he would turn eighteen this school year; he was a senior which meant he'd graduate in only nine months.

All the blond could really focus on was the emotions that welled up inside of him when he met him for the first time. _"Is it, really? Is this really the first time you met?" a voice had whispered inside his head._ That feeling of loss melted away like snow before the sun. He felt relieved, happy… hell, he could even cry just by staring at the man.

- _Well then, this is not farewell. See you… Gilbert._

He skipped his last two lessons just so that he could spend some more time with the raven, his senior as well didn't seem troubled at all by the fact that he was missing classes just so that he could talk to him. _Did he know? Did he? Did he? Could it be possible?_ He had let the older male enter his dark room at first, he had let him watch while he readied his workspace, and then he let the teen watch how he worked. At first, they only spoke of photography. Oz explained what was what, he even said some interesting history facts. Well, to Oz they were interesting. But Gilbert never interrupted them, he just let him talk.

And when they had been done, Oz had cleaned everything up. His pictures had been safely put away in a dark bag.

Curtains had been opened and light entered the classroom, it usually was so quiet… with only the sound of a radio playing music in the background. But not that day, they both sat across from each other on unused desks and talked about whatever came to their minds first.

It was odd, the more he got to know Gil, the more it felt like he was coming home. Everything was familiar, yet it had been too long since he last visited, he had to get used to the place again.

 _I have a brother, Vincent. He's your age. – I…I don't really like cats. I like dogs, though! – My favorite color…. Is uh… blue? I think? I don't really know… - I like reading, yeah. – Oh, no, no! There is absolutely no way that I could ever take such pretty pictures as you…_

He just kept asking one question after another, he wasn't even worried if it might bother the senior. _He knew he could bother him as much, he'd never get tired of him_.

By the end of the day, Gilbert had lost all tension in his shoulders and they spoke like friends catching up after not having seen each other in a long time.

* * *

 **Tell me if you found any spelling mistakes.**

 **I'm not so sure about this chapter, so reviews would be nice ^^'**

 **I'll be switching between Gil's and Oz's point of view a lot, but most of the time it will be Gilbert's pov.**

 **Sometimes another character will take over.**


	3. Oz: Golden Snowdrops

**I don't own Pandora Hearts.**

* * *

Someone once asked him, why he choose to be a photographer. Oz remembered how he had lowered his camera; the butterfly he had tried to capture had already flown away once it noticed the presence of a second person. At that quiet and peaceful moment, the wasted opportunity had not upset the blond. He had met the gaze of his new friend at that time, and for once in his life, he had hesitated about his answer.

There was a lie, waiting on the tip of his tongue. The same lie he always used when someone asked him about certain hobbies of his. _Because some things were simply not meant to be shared._ There was but only one other person who knew of the true reason why he choose to pick up a camera one day and never let go of it.

In the end, he went for the same lie he told everyone.

"Because I like to capture those moments the mind easily forgets."

In his memories, the face of his friend always remained blank. Yet he knew the boy at that moment, had let out a soft breath of amazement.

" _Heh, that's quite deep_." The boy had joked.

And Oz had laughed, like so many other times he had laughed with that person. Because no matter how close he got to a certain person, none of them had to know what kept him thinking all day and night. They wouldn't understand the chaos inside his mind. There were so many answers running through his head, and none of them got answered. Everyday brought another question to the never-ending pile, and by now, Oz had mastered the art of pushing everything somewhere far into the back of his head. He left it there to catch dust.

So when the time arrived, you couldn't blame him for that small spark of hope that welled up inside of him once he started talking to Gilbert Raven.

His hope had been for naught, for not once did the young raven mention anything of having met somewhere before.

Of course Gilbert didn't leave him disappointed, the West still felt like he had gained something important that day. He no longer felt like something was missing, and for that alone, he was already very grateful.

So when the senior finally came to the question, "Why do you like it?" he smiled, as if he had prepared himself for this moment his whole life.

The truth had never rolled so easily of his tongue as back then, he felt what little there was left of the tension inside of him leave with every word he said; For even if Gilbert did not understand what he said, to him it felt like a confession to a lost friend who deserved the truth.

"Because… for as long as I can remember, I've had this feeling of having forgotten something important." He saw the understanding in those golden eyes, and that little spark of hope made his heart flutter from excitement. Gilbert held his breath as Oz spoke, he hung to every word he said and the boy's smile only grew, happiness taking over his whole body. "I feel like… there's this person." He turned his head so that he could gaze outside of the tall windows, the sun was slowly disappearing behind the horizon, it casted an orange light on the world and made it seem like everything was on fire. "A distant family member perhaps…" he breathed out a sigh as he tried to remember the face of the person he once called uncle; he could almost smell the familiar scent of tobacco and an expensive perfume. The image of a tall and strong build man appeared in front of him.

" _Oz…. I… wish for you to be... happy."_ his mind liked to play tricks on him, it liked to tear every memory of him apart and only show him what little there was left of them.

"Who liked to take pictures? He had this… special camera, the first picture he would ever take with that camera was supposed to be special." He felt so calm and peaceful at that moment, knowing that no matter how ridiculous he sounded at that very moment, Gilbert would understand. "But whatever he wanted to capture with this special camera… he could never do it. And instead…. He took a picture of the happiest day of his life." The boy had chuckled, "I lost that man a long time ago, in another life, you might even say… and I just feel… like, this way I can be closer to him. To everything I cannot remember."

Oz had then glanced at the raven, "You could say I've lost my mind."

Gilbert had gaped at him, it appeared to the blond that the raven had wanted to say a thousand things at that moment. Which led to him opening and closing his mouth for a couple of times, because he didn't know what to say first. And when the noise coming out of his mouth was finally turning into words, he only ended up stumbling over them.

Which led to Oz bursting out in laughter, a beautiful laugh that came from deep inside of him. The teen had to hold his stomach, as relief washed over him. He heard Gilbert's flustered attempt of saving himself but knew it was hopeless.

"Wh-what I… what I meant to say is; I-I know what you're speaking of."

Oz had stopped laughing the moment those words had left his friend's mouth; he sniffed while he urged the raven to go on with a simple eager nod.

Gilbert's face had started to turn red, but he still explained to the young photographer what he had meant with those words. "I've been searching for answers my whole life… I've… I've had this feeling of forgetting something important my whole life. And then there are those memories of a life I never lived…" he hesitated once he noticed the blond had narrowed his eyes slightly, "A-ah… sorry I-…"

"No, no. Go on." The teen had offered him a soft smile,

Gilbert took a deep breath before he continued, "S-say, Oz… do you believe in angels?" of all questions he had expected, believing in angels had not been one of them. The blond couldn't deny the fact that he had been surprised.

"I…I don't think I've ever thought about it." An image of a statue flashed before his eyes, _the blue feathered angel. Echo wearing a dress with wings, there were fireworks and… and-_

"My mother believed in them…"

Oz had noticed the painful expression on the raven's face once he spoke of his mother, he decided not to comment on it and instead let the senior continue talking. "She told me there was a piece of angel in every one of us. And that…" he chuckled nervously, "That angels had soul mates… or something like that." He made a loose gesture, as if it wasn't important. Oz could tell those words meant the world for the raven. "And I don't know, I just… I always believed that perhaps, if you're friends with someone in another life, that you become soul mates in a next."

"So… what do you think about me?" Oz had a mischievous smile on his face when he asked him this.

"I believe we've met somewhere before."

The bell rang. Classes had ended; it was time to head home. The west had gasped softly for air, eyes fixed on the taller male sitting in front of him.

That day, Oz received his second confession in the school's dark room. And while he did not like to be reminded of the first, he couldn't be more then delighted about the second. For those two confessions were as different as day and night. Gil's confession made his heart flutter, he felt light in his head as thought of all the things they could do together. They weren't alone in this world, there were others like them who felt like they missed pieces of their puzzles.

And Oz would always remember how quiet and peaceful the atmosphere around them had been, how they had basked in that afternoon light and enjoyed each other's presence for the first time in a very long time.

Oz would never forget how on that day, he had been more then happy to have met Gilbert.

.

That thought changed like snow melted before the sun by the end of the week.


	4. Gil: Oz is (not) fine

**Tell me if you find any spelling mistakes.**

 **I do not own Pandora Hearts.**

 **Currently looking for a Beta reader**

* * *

 _At the end of the next week, Oz had gotten so sick, he didn't show up at school for five days._

Oz lived his life completely different then others. That was the first impression Gilbert had of him. The blond boy seemed to live the life everyone dreamed off. He had two loving parents; his mother was head chef in the town's most famous restaurant. His father wrote for magazines and was a bestselling novelist. Gilbert's mother had loved his work. If having successful parents wasn't impressive enough, the boy himself had enough talent to go far in life once he graduated. It turned out not only the school used his work, but other magazines and even newspapers used them. Many companies had already given him some small projects to work on.

 _(On Monday, he simply complained about not having had enough rest the night before._

He could play on the piano and violin, together with Elliot they had participated in a lot of music contests and more then once even came back with the first price. Alice even told him they would have probably gone overseas but something had held them back. When the raven had asked what exactly this was, the brunette had told him it was none of his business. So instead of playing classical music in front of hundreds of people, they performed as a band of four everywhere people asked for them to show up. When asked if they had a band name, Leo had confessed that they couldn't quite decide and told them they currently went by "Statice" because Elliot was a nerd that knew the language of flowers.

Oz was good at every class he participated in, this combined with being the school's own personal photographer had led to teachers turning a blind eye to him whenever he skipped classes.

 _(Tuesday he kept casting quick glances over his shoulder, as if he was expecting someone to pop up from behind at any moment._

Which seemed so out of character for him, the raven didn't even know why Oz, the boy from his memories who loved studying with such a great passion, could skip classes and not even bat an eye while doing so.

The whole school knew that every Thursday he skipped P.E and could instead be found in his dark room. When he asked why he skipped P.E, the only useful response he got had been from Elliot who had glared at him for five whole minutes before even answering.

"Beats me," he had admitted while getting a hand through his messy hair, he hadn't slept well the night before. "It's been like this since we were freshmen."

"So like… he stopped doing P.E once he entered high school?"

He had found it rather surprising how easily Oz and his friends had accepted him in their group of friends, not even three days later of having met the blond and the others already knew who he was and talked to him whenever they spotted him alone. Which was a lot actually. That day, Elliot had seen him sitting alone while eating lunch and simply took a seat next to him.

 _(On Wednesday he carried a thermos bottle around with caffeine._

The young Nightray seemed to like glaring at him until Gilbert got very uncomfortable before he answered. "No, he stopped around New Year. But back then something happened that kind of excused him from attending any class. Eventually he picked up all his classes, but he never participated in P.E again."

"You must know, Gilbert." Leo then said, he had kept silent the entire conversation, too engrossed in the Victorian drama he had been reading. To be honest, the young raven hadn't even noticed his presence at all until he started to talk. Elliot didn't bat an eye, which meant he got used to this sort of behavior from his friend. "Oz is a person who carries many secrets, and he's rather fond of them." While his tone remained casual and he had a friendly smile on his face, the Raven couldn't help but feel like he was being threatened. _Don't pry into things that don't concern you, if you hurt Oz because of your unnecessary prying we will hurt you_. "He still doesn't talk about what happened in December 2012 to us. Please don't bring it up, it'll ruin his mood."

It was true, Oz lived his life completely different then others. Gilbert soon learned this. But just like any other person, the blond had secrets and touchy subjects. Which proofed that he was just like any other person.

* * *

"You think _I'm_ perfect?" Oz asked him on a Thursday during lunch break, soon the bell would ring to tell them another period would start. He knew Oz wouldn't even budge, he'd continue working on his laptop like school didn't exist.

Instead of working in his darkroom, he was editing some pictures on his laptop. " _You see, Adobe has this cool thing called Lightroom, which s kind of like a darkroom, but then digital_." He had explained. The blond yawned for the fifth time in ten minutes. Gilbert noticed he seemed a lot paler then last week, his eyes were always glassed over because of fatigue.

"Well of course I'd think you're perfect," the older male said flustered, he avoided eye contact, as if that would keep Oz from noticing his burning cheeks. The younger teen had cast him a quick look before returning his gaze back towards his screen, he chuckled softly while he picked up his thermos bottle and drank from it. The scent of caffeine filled his nose. "You seem too be good at everything!"

To which Oz laughed, Gilbert couldn't help but smirk when hearing the blond like that. Even though he seemed to be getting sick and something was obviously troubling him, Oz had still smiled at him when they met up. The teen seemed content at that moment, which was all that mattered at that point.

"I have an appointment with an eye specialist next week. My sight isn't what it used to be, so there's a chance I'll have to wear glasses." He then spoke, "Does that still make me perfect?"

To which Gilbert chuckled, "Yes." He said it like it was his duty to so, as if he was Oz's-… no, the thought blurred inside of his mind before he could fully grasp it.

"My family and friends have forbidden me to ever cook for them again, apparently I am a terrible cook."

The raven nodded, "Yeah, I remember you almost poisoning Aida once."

To which Oz nodded in agreement, he barked out a laugh. "Right! Miss Kate scolded me for two hours because I could have gotten seriously injured." The teen rubbed in his eyes, he chuckled softly to himself.

A comfortabele silence fell.

"I'm not perfect, Gil. In fact, I think I'm rather far from it." The teen confessed softly, his gaze never leaving his screen. At some point he had opened Photoshop and Gilbert saw how he was editing a picture of Alice with her famous red coat. The whole school had nicknamed her Red Riding hood because of it. Oz had made the colors in the background fade away so that the red stood out even more.

They spend the rest of their lunch break in silence, until the bell rang and Gilbert had to get up if he wanted to make it in time for his next class. "A-are you doing anything after school?" he blurted out, face heating up once again.

Oz's hand stilled on his laptop's mouse and he looked up to meet his gaze. Once he saw how much effort it seemed to take his senior to even ask him such a question, he smiled in amusement. His eyes glistening with joy. "Nothing in particular, _why_?" he sounded like he was ready to laugh again.

And Gilbert felt like a complete idiot, he honestly wondered why it was so hard to ask such simple things to Oz. It was obvious the blond enjoyed his presence, he had accepted him as a friend in no time and yet Gilbert couldn't help but feel like he had to keep some sort of respectable distance between them.

"T-there's this… erhm… new- uhm… thing. My brother, Vince.. told me to check it out. I was wondering… I mean, if you want to that is-"

"Sure, should I ask the others?" Oz smiled kindly, perhaps he felt pity for him, because it seemed so hard to invite him.

"O-others?"

"Alice, Echo-chan, Elliot, Leo… Oh! I could ask Break, Sharon-chan and Reim as well if you'd like."

His heart stuttered as a wave of disappointment rushed over him, he still managed to smile. "Y-yeah, sure! Th-thanks."

"No problem. Now go, Sir. Barma gives you detention if you're late."

"Right!" He turned around and started walking away, it was when he reached the end of the hallway that he turned around again to cast a quick look at his friend. Oz was still sitting on the stairs, gaze fixed on the screen of his Macbook pro.

It was then that he realized something was off, something he had said to Oz wasn't right.

Yet he couldn't remember what it was.

In the end, his plan to spend some more time alone with Oz hadn't gone as well as planned. So he ended up eating dinner with not only the young West but also with, a very irritated Elliot, because apparently they had planned a band rehearsal and Oz had found another excuse to escape _again_. Leo had tagged along, of course. Wherever the Nightray was, Leo also was. Sharon had been more then happy to have received an invitation by the school's legend, so of course couldn't refuse. With her came Break and Reim, who both refused to speak to each other for some reason. "They remind me of an old married couple." Alice had whispered in Oz's ear once she thought no one was paying attention. Alice rarely left the blond's side, so it wasn't a big surprise really that she had showed up as well.

By then, Gilbert had also learned that wherever Oz went, he always did his best to involve Echo in it. So there she was, softly speaking to Oz, she had taken the seat on his right side while Alice sat on his left. And Gil… well Gil had been pushed to the other end of the table between Break and Reim.

"So…. What's bothering you two?" He tried to ask.

To which Break responded with a threatening smile, he explained in a sugar-coated voice that it was none of Raven's god damn business and that if he wanted to get through this little event without embarrassing himself in front of _Oz_ , he'd better leave his little mouth shut.

Reim had simply explained in a very polite and curt way that he and Break had a disagreement. Still a _fuck off_ , a polite one, but a fuck off nonetheless.

The teen sighed as he gazed at Oz interacting with the others, he saw his cheeks turn a few shades redder when Echo got too close. Alice had wanted to tell her something but due the chaos of their rather crowded booth, which was not meant for a group as big as theirs, she had to get closer.

He saw the way Oz gazed at the girl, as if she had put the moon and stars in the sky, and thought, it wasn't so bad after all. He gave his new friend an excuse to spend time with Echo. Seeing the blond happy and in love was enough for him.

After all, they were connected by their shadows.

* * *

Friday came and with it, came the promise of weekend. Break and Reim still refused to talk and thus, Sharon had decided to leave them on their own to sort things out and instead spend time by the young raven's side. She complained about their stupid little fight, and Gil listened like the good friend he was. "It's about something stupid, I'm sure of it! When have those two ever fought about something serious." She furiously ranted while searching for her Chemistry book in her locker.

"You seem to really care about them." He concluded.

He regretted his words as soon as they had left his mouth, Sharon clumsily dropped her heavy books, papers scattered around the floor while the girl tried to come up with a proper explanation of why she cared so much about those two idiots. "I-I mean, o-of… of course I'd ca-care about those two- … idiots!" she stammered, her face turning red. She tried to glare at him but failed miserably, to which Raven could only raise an eyebrow in amusement. "I-it's because they're both like… brothers- yes! Brothers. They're both like brothers to me, so-so you see…"

Out of the corner of his eyes he spotted a familiar shape, he looked up immediately, hand already halfway up to wave at the small blond boy only for him to freeze on his spot. Yesterday, Oz had looked tired. Today, the boy appeared to be truly exhausted. It was as if the blond could sense the other male's presence, he looked up from his conversation with Alice to meet his gaze. The West tried greeting him with a smile out of politeness, but only a sad grimace appeared on his face before his face turned even paler and he ran off.

Alice looked over her shoulders, to see what exactly had made her friend's situation even worse. When her gaze landed on him, some sort of realization dawned over her face. As if The raven was a piece of puzzle and she had just solved a part of it. She nodded at him, before heading the same way as her childhood friend. Her message had been clear.

"M'sorry, Sharon." He interrupted the girl who had still been talking to him, "Gotta go." Without even thinking twice about it, he dashed after the blond.

Somehow, Gilbert had started to think that Oz's safe haven was his black room. Judging by the amount of time the teen spend in that small classroom alone. So of course he ended up being a little bit surprised when he saw the blond walked past the door as if it was just any other regular room. Instead he walked fast through the constant moving mass of students to the school's gardens.

He only stopped when he was far away from the school building, when he reached the blond, Alice was already there asking him what was wrong.

"-Wrong?" she asked, her eyes wide with worry.

"It's nothing. I'm fine." He heard Oz talk, but things were far from okay.

"Hogwash!" she snapped at him, "Something happened. You've been lying to me this entire week, it's time you start talking or I will tell Helen and Peter. Oz I swear, I will them!"

To which the boy made a soft whimpering noise as he slid down against the tree he had hidden behind, away from any prying eyes. "You promised."

"I promised not to tell them _if_ you could fix this. _This_ , whatever this is. Is not fixed." Her words were hard, she almost spat them out in her friend's face. Even though the harshness of her words, her eyes were still filled with affection and worry. Her anger had been born out of concern. She had to watch how her friend only seemed to get worse and worse without being able to tell anyone, he couldn't blame her for finally losing her calm. He saw her eyes shining with unshed tears and couldn't help but feeling like he wanted to reach out to her first, while it was quite obvious Oz was the one needing help the most.

"What's wrong?"

As if stung by a wasp, Oz's head snapped up to meet his gaze. He saw the surprise written on his face, and all Gilbert needed was but a second to take him fully in. The blond seemed to have lost some weight, he noticed. His hair was messier then usual and the bags under his eyes stood out against his pale skin. He couldn't help but feel troubled by seeing his friend's weary appearance. "Oz… wh-… what happened?"

"It's nothing." The boy sighed, trying to casually shrug it off. "I've been having some trouble with falling asleep lately."

Alice made a soft sound, "Oz-"

"It's not like that, Alice." He offered her a weak smile. "It has nothing to do with that."

"You'd promise you'd tell me if it was." The girl whispered softly,

"And I'm keeping that promise."

She nodded in understanding and then turned her head towards Raven, just when he had started questioning himself what actually he was doing here. "I'm calling his parents. Take him home." The girl ordered her senior.

"W-wait? Wh-what!"

"Alice…" Oz whined.

The young Baskerville was having none of their complaints, "Since I'll be too busy keeping up for _two_ , it's better if I go to class now and for seaweed brain to take you home."

"It's not seaweed you stupid rabbit!" he snapped out of pure reflex. _Huh._ What? Why had he just called her a rabbit?

Alice only smirked, as she knew exactly what had just happened. "Plus, I know you go by bike. Which means Oz will be fast home." She ignored the blond complaining in the background, "I'm still here y'know! Don't make arrangements for me and leave me out of the conversation."

In the end, both teenagers knew there was no fighting it. Alice would get her way, no matter what.

So that's how Gilbert found himself riding his bicycle towards the nook of the city he had never set foot in, following Oz's instructions. The younger male was quiet, his silence caused for nothing but weary feeling settling deep in his stomach.

"She worries too much, you know." The West finally admitted, he sat with his back towards the raven, holding onto both sides of the back seat on his bike. "I told her I'm fine."

"You don't look okay though."

"I'm just tired… take a turn to your left at the end of this street."

"Why can't you sleep then?"

When there was no answer, Gilbert sighed. "Oz… I know I'm not a doctor, but I can't help you if you won't speak to me."

"Nr. 5."

"What? Oh!" he almost missed it but managed to halt right in time, the blond made a soft 'oompf' sound and almost lost his balance.

The house wasn't anything like the raven had expected, he had expected a mansion, or perhaps a loft. His parents were rich after all, nothing had prepared him for this small cosy looking two story building.

Oz jumped off the bike and headed straight towards the door, he casted a curious look over his shoulder at him. "Would you like to… come in?" how could someone change so much in just the time span of a week?

"I…I.-" he needed to go back, sure Alice would tell everyone Oz was sick, she apparently even had Oz's parents their cell phone number so could explain to them their son had gotten sick and had to head back home. But there was no one at school that would do that for him. The senior knew he could get into trouble if they caught him skipping classes. His school record from the previous school wasn't something to brag about either.

Oz nodded in understanding, "R-right… sorry. Uhm… thanks-"

"S-sure!"

The blond blinked, probably pondering if he had heard the raven right.

"S-someone needs to make sure you go straight to bed after all." He managed to utter, trying to hide his blush.

The hint of a smile appeared on Oz's face, "Alright." And he unlocked the door of his home, inviting him in.


	5. Gil: He's only cute when he sleeps

**I do not own Pandora Hearts.**

 **Reviews make my day! ^^**

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Oz's house wasn't anything like Gilbert had imagined it to be. From the outside he could already tell it wasn't very big. But it was enough, enough for three people living together, _and_ , the raven noticed: occasionally four. Everywhere he looked, he found traces of Alice. Pictures of her and Oz decorated the wall. The blond himself didn't even pay much attention to them; he had seen those pictures plenty of times after all. While his senior couldn't help but stop halfway in the hallway so that he could give each of them a proper look.

He noticed that most of them were pictures taken on vacation, on one he saw a woman who must obviously be Oz's mother taking a selfie while her son and husband weren't paying attention, too busy with talking to each other while holding a map, behind them Gilbert recognized the Eiffel tower.

On another picture, he saw a younger Oz smiling brightly at the camera while holding a melting ice-cream popsicle, next to him stood a grinning Alice who made V-sing, her hair tied up in a messy bun, they must have been younger then ten in the picture. One picture was of Oz's parents on their wedding day, gazing at each other with nothing but love in their eyes.

A picture of Helen holding a crying baby while smiling fondly at him, on another picture he saw her standing in the kitchen, preparing some sort of meal. He smiled when he saw Alice crawling on Oz's shoulders so that she could get a better look at the meal.

There was a picture of Peter sitting behind his laptop with thick glasses on his face, with one hand he was typing and the other kept a small blond boy from falling off, he saw the way Oz was all curled up in his father.

" _So he finally got the family he deserved, huh."_

Then there were the pictures taken in the mountains, he saw Oz talking to a young brown haired boy, the same boy he had seen on other pictures as well. There was one of a family party during Christmas where both Oz and the younger boy were unwrapping their presents. There's also a picture where a five-year-old Oz is holding a sleeping baby… was this perhaps a younger brother?

Gilbert turned his head slightly and saw that Oz was still waiting for him, behind him were the stairs that led to upstairs and next to him was an entry to the living room.

"Your younger brother?" the raven then asked, he pointed at a picture of Oz reading a book and the brunette playing on an old beaten-up gameboy.

"Cousin, although people have told me I treat him too much like a younger brother." Oz smiled, it was forced. For a second, the older teen had forgotten that he wasn't here to gaze at family pictures. He was here to make sure Oz went to bed and got the sleep he so much needed. "His name is Philippe."

He nodded, not really knowing were to place the new information. The name made a bell ring somewhere in the back of his mind, like he had heard Oz mention it before. _No… not this Oz_ , the boy from his memories had mentioned him once. _'We were at a party and you suddenly called his name-'_

Gilbert yawned.

To which Oz chuckled, he had been leaning against the wall but once he saw his friend yawn he got up again, an amused smile on his face. "Would you like some coffee?"

"Only if you promise not to drink any."

Oz didn't reply, he simply walked through the living room to get to his dining room; their kitchen itself was a small part of said room. It could barely fit four people in it. "Latte good?"

"A-ah, yes. Sure… thanks." He nodded while looking around the dining room. The table was big enough for six people to eat, but only four seats had placemats. Two were handmade by a child; from what he could see they were old and used. Both looked the same, the only big difference was the text written on it in a childish handwriting. _'I love you mommy'_ and ' _I love you daddy'_. He took a seat behind the placemat, which had the picture of a knight fighting a dragon; it looked almost as old as the other two placemats. As if their owners didn't want to get rid of them. The fourth placemat was one of Alice in Wonderland and while it still seemed to be as old as the others, it had been used slightly less. _Alice's_.

It was no wonder some people had them confused as siblings, he wondered if you'd find traces of Oz in the Baskerville house as well.

Gilbert turned his gaze to look at the blond; a frown appeared on his face once he noticed the blond had dozed off while staring at the coffee machine. The machine no longer made any noise. The West simply stared at it with this absentminded gaze.

"Oz?"

As soon as he heard his name, the blond sucked in a breath while he blinked a few times fast, "Ah… sorry." He mumbled tiredly while rubbing his eyes. "I should have listened to Alice right away and just call in sick today." He yawned while grabbing the cup he prepared for his senior and walking back into the dining room.

"Why didn't you?" Gilbert asked, he murmured a quick thank you once the blond handed him the cup with hot liquid.

"I almost had to repeat my freshmen year because I had been absent too many times."

"Were you sick?"

Oz had a sorrowful expression on his face, for a second he appeared so fragile. It wasn't just his face, his whole being seemed to have lost all of its colour. He no longer looked as bright as the day he had first met him, when they had both skipped classes and stayed in that classroom for hours. Talking about their lives as if they had been friends for years and were simply catching up. He remembered how the warm afternoon sunlight had shone down on the teen, how vibrant and alive he had seemed. It was only a week ago when Oz had given him a beautiful smile showing tow rows of perfect white teeth. And now… now Gil was already happy if he saw the corners of his lips go up.

The teen then sighed, "I guess so." He then admitted softly, which only led to Gil having more questions. Questions he did not dare to ask, Leo's threat still hung fresh in his memory. But it wasn't Leo that made him bite his tongue, it was seeing Oz like this that made him want to shut-up. The Raven wanted nothing more then to know everything of what happened in Oz's life, to know what made him sad and which scars still hurt, he needed to know in order to help him. But sometimes staying silent was better; some wounds didn't need to be reopened. He had learned this the hard way himself.

The West got himself a glass of water while explaining to the raven that his father had a meeting with his publisher that day. "His new book isn't like anything he's ever written before, his publisher isn't sure if his readers will like it." He started talking and for a second, he saw a glint of the Oz from a week ago.

In the end he stayed way longer then he should, more then sure he'd be in trouble once he returned to school. Sure Alice could have told his classmates to explain his situation to the teachers, but as much as they liked Oz and let him get away with almost everything, he was sure Gil had no such privilege. Everyone knew his school record wasn't very clean. Most of it because of the teachers blaming him for Vincent's little pranks, but also because he had done a few things here and there he wasn't so proud of. Most of the things he had done were under influence of bad friends, not that it mattered of course.

He headed back to school around lunch, sneaking unnoticed back into the school building. Oz had waved him off on his doorstep and rolled his eyes with a smile on his face after Gilbert reminded him to head straight to bed. "Yes mom!" he had laughed.

He found Reim sitting alone at their usual spot, a frown on his face while he cleaned his glasses, his lunch still untouched.

"H-hey."

The brunette's head snapped up as if bitten by a wasp, of course as soon as he saw it was just him he relaxed and dare he say it, seemed to be even slightly disappointed. "Hey." he nodded and offered him a kind smile while making some room for Gil to sit. "You weren't in class."

"Yeah… O-Oz… he uhm… he got sick so I…"

"I know, I heard Xerxes explain it to Sir Barma, he must have passed the word because all others teachers seemed to know and asked no further questions.

"Ah…" he nodded and awkwardly took his seat on a step lower then Reim.

They sat there for a while, Reim kept furiously wiping his glasses clean as if there was some disgusting stain he couldn't get rid of while the raven awkwardly looked around and tried to eat the sandwich his father had made for him. He gave up after a few bites and decided to just give the rest to Vince. Gilbert hated throwing food away and his younger brother always seemed to be hungry so no harm would be done.

"So…" he finally murmured, "You and Break are still fighting?" it wasn't that hard to guess, Break was probably hiding somewhere from him, and Sharon, being the good sister she was, must have gone after him. That or she decided to sit with someone else, having had enough of those two idiots. Honestly, the raven couldn't blame her if this was the case.

Reim made an irritated noise, which the taller teen translated to a _yes_.

"I see." He nodded a few times, he rubbed his hands while looking around the long hallway, there was a small group of friends eating on the ground, one of the girls was laughing very hard because of some joke she understood too late. The others laughed along with her. "Wh-what exactly is it… that you're fighting about?" he knew it wasn't hard to piss off Break. He had after all done it twice while only knowing the albino for a month. Then again, he had been prodding in things that weren't any of his business.

 _\- "B-Break… can I ask you something_?" he had asked him once after school, their classes had ended earlier and both had been waiting for Sharon and Reim.  
" _What is it, Gilbert?"_ He remembered the carefree aura the albino had around him, and how easily his mood had changed. Even though it had still been October back then and it nog being so cold yet, he had already worn a thicker jacket and a scarf and hat to keep himself warm. The Raven had guessed one of the reasons for the hat was also so that his hair would keep a bit in place, making it easier to hide his secret.  
" _Uhm… y-your eye, was that really… really an accident?"  
_ He had remembered how Break had straightened his back, no longer leaning his full weight against their school's gate. " _Does it matter?"_ there had been a threat in his voice. _  
_It didn't matter, he should have shrugged it off and talked about something else. But ever since he met Break, guilt had been eating him alive. Because it had only taken him one look to remember him as the small boy that lived in the old house next to him. The small and frail looking boy who always showed up at his doorstep covered in bruises, asking him if they could play because his parents were _working_. He remembered the way his mother and father had once fought in the kitchen, his mother screaming at her husband that they couldn't keep turning a blind eye to this. _–We need to call the cops!_ But his father had wanted to hear none of it, saying she might be wrong. _–The boy is very pale, he bruises easily. He's clumsy, you've seen him fall before! Just because Diane and Derek seem a bit off does not mean they're bad parents!_ His father never forgave himself for not listening to her, as did Gil. He had seen the signs just like them, but had ignored them.  
" _I-it's just that… I'm sorry. I should have done something_."  
To which Break had laughed, it had sounded hollow. _"Don't be foolish, Gilbert. You were just a snot-faced brat, there's nothing you could have done_." -

Reim sighed, "It's about something stupid, really." He then admitted.

Gilbert remained silent, waiting for him to continue.

Which he did, "I… I saw Xerxes talk to Oz."

"To Oz?" off all things he had expected to hear, he knew that Break and Oz knew each other. He had seen the blond talk with Sharon after all, Elliot had even teased the blond once because it appeared that the West had a crush on her in their freshmen year. Those feelings had of course ebbed away after the girl rejected him. Out of that rejection blossomed a beautiful friendship and it was obvious that Oz wouldn't have wanted it any other way now. Wherever Sharon went, Break usually tagged along, if he wasn't too busy wandering around alone like the creep he sometimes liked to be. So it wasn't that hard to imagine that somewhere along the line, those two must have befriended each other as well.

"I-I know it sounds lame. B-but hear me out okay, I saw Xerxes talk with Oz. And… and you know what Oz looked like this past week, he isn't usually like this. You know?" Reim started rambling, he must have been walking around with these bottled up emotions for a while now and was more then grateful to finally relieve some tension. He let out a nervous laugh while finally putting on his glasses again, "Oz… well he isn't usually like that! You-you must know that Gilbert…. I-I mean, you just met him so… you probably think he's always like this-… uhm…" _Ah_ , he remembered something. When they had gone to that new snack bar the day before, he had caught a glimpse of Oz talking to Reim. They had both been worried about each other, Reim because of Oz looking so worn out and Oz because it was obvious his friend had been in a terrible mood. _They were friends_.

"B-But my point is!" Reim then sputtered, "X-Xerxes had this… this _look_!" he held out both hands as if that should explain the look, "And… I've only ever seen him look like that to Oz… ever since they suddenly became friends after Oz's friend passed away two years ago and… I don't know."

 _Wait… what?_

"I-I'm not stupid, okay? I know Break's life before Sharon's mother adopted him wasn't okay. I mean… we've all seen the bruises! He only has one eye, okay? Of course I'm worried. And then he has this thing, this _thing_ between him and Oz that only they seem to share. And I got worried, perhaps one of Break's parents killed themselves and that's why he got abused? Okay, I don't know. And… it's freaking me out. Because he's my friend and I care about him but…" and then Reim halted, he had this painful look in his eyes. "I just want to help him… but he won't let us in. Not even Sharon knows about his past."

Gilbert gulped, not sure if he had just misunderstood his friend. _Oz had a best friend in his freshmen year… and this friend… killed himself? Is this the thing Elliot had mentioned?_ "Reim…" he finally said, noticing just how weak his voice sounded.

Reim didn't notice, "Yeah?" at some point, he must have gotten his hands through his hair because it stood up in all sorts of weird angles, he had seen Reim stress out over school before, knew that he even had to take pills for it. But never had he seen him so stressed out. Gilbert couldn't help but smile, to the young Lunette's confusion. "You're a good friend."

He saw some tension leave the brunette and he actually managed to smile back, "So are you."

"I'm really not…" he couldn't stay out of anyone's business and only hurt people.

"Yes you are, I mean. Look at what you just did for Oz, and you only met him a week ago. Really Gilbert, I'm glad I met you."

He coughed, his cheeks started to heat up and once his friend noticed this, he burst out in laughter. _Oh well…_ at least he helped Reim calm down a bit. That's something. In the end, he laughed with him, because he knew he must have looked stupid, getting all flustered over a simple compliment.

"You should talk with Break." He spoke once they had both calmed down, "He cares about you as well. But you're right, he's an idiot and doesn't want to admit it."

"Such a big idiot." Reim agreed with him.

Once the bell rang, they got up and headed towards their next class. The topic having switched to something more light.

Break sat alone in the back of the class, no classmate dared to sit even nearby to him. He saw them fight over a chair at the front just so they didn't have to get too close. The albino as always didn't seem to notice, he let his head rest on both his arms while leaning on the desk. Reim sighed once he saw the miserable state his friend was in, "I guess there's no helping it." He murmured and glanced at the Raven. "M'sorry Gilbert."

"It's fine." He smiled while watching Reim take the seat next to the albino, Break looked up and seemed to be ready to snap the newcomers face off for disturbing his slumber, only for him to calm down once he noticed it was Reim. His shoulders slumped and his eye seemed to widen. "Oh." And he then lay his head down again and turned it away from his friend, a pout on his lips.

Gil and Reim exchanged a 'so done' look with each other.

Gilbert took the seat next to a girl he vaguely recognized from other classes. He was worried about Oz and wondered if he perhaps should have stayed longer just to make sure the blond had actually gotten to bed.

He quickly send the blond a text.

-Hey, just checking in. You're sleeping right? Tell me if you need anything. Get well soon!-

The teacher entered the class and the day went on like any other day, no one seemed to have noticed he wasn't present the first part of the day. The senior couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed when Oz didn't reply right away, the blond usually didn't need that long to answer.

He knew he should be happy; Oz not answering was a good thing. It meant he was sleeping. Which he should be doing.

At the end of that period, his phone finally buzzed. His eyes widened in surprise once he read Alice's name on his screen. In her message there was a picture of a sleeping Oz, his hair a mess and the sheets pulled up to his nose. _'Peter told me to send you this. Caption was 'He's only cute when he sleeps'. He also likes to thank you for bringing him home._

Huh. The raven snorted.

Alice might not look like it, but she did take care of everything.

 _-Want to hang out after school? My treat.-_ he send her.

 _-!-_ he didn't have to wait for her response to long, he chuckled at her eagerness, _-YESSSSS-_


	6. Gil: Strawberry Milkshakes

**I do not own Pandora Hearts.**

 **Currently looking for a beta.**

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"You know…. When Oz used to be younger, back when we were kids. He sometimes asked me where the other boy was." Alice said, she took a sip from her banana milkshake. The girl had the same absentminded look in her eyes as Oz earlier that day, as if she was somewhere far away in her mind.

Gilbert didn't really knew how to respond, not after seeing her finish a sandwich in what seemed to be like only two bites. To say the raven was still a bit shell-shocked would be an understatement. So Alice took his silence as a ' _go on_ '.

"He had somehow convinced himself that we had another friend, one with curly black hair and golden eyes." She glanced at Gilbert; her eyes seemed to scan his face as if he held the answers to many questions.

It took a moment for her words to sink in, Gilbert realized just a tad bit too late what she had meant. He had never described the color of his eyes gold, most of the time he had thought they were a sick pale amber. His mother used to call them gold, said there was a treasure hidden behind them.

"Wh-what do you mean?" he finally managed to ask, not sure if he was really in the mood to finish eating his hamburger and fries. Which the younger girl of course noticed, before he could even say yes to her silent question of 'are you gonna eat that?' she had already snatched it from his plate and taken a huge bite from it.

"What I mean is," she said between two bites, "You're like him, aren't you? That's why Oz didn't have any trouble with befriending you."

"Or… m-maybe he's just nice?"

Alice glared at him; it was obvious she did not like his denial. He saw her finish the burger with another huge bite; she then proceeded stealing fries from his plate. "No, Oz is just being nice when he talks to sir Yura, he's just being nice when he talks to your brother. But when it comes to you," she pointed at him with a fry, "He acts like you're an old friend that returned from a long vacation." She narrowed her eyes. "It took me a while, 'cuz for a second I thought he simply liked you. Just like he liked Elliot the moment they met, but no." she shook her head. That day, Alice had her long brown hair put up in a messy bun, the few strands of hair that had escaped swung with every movement she made. Now that he took a better look at the outfit she wore, he was more then certain the sweater she wore wasn't from her closet. It looked like something Oz would wear. "You're like him, aren't you?" and then quietly added, " _Like us_."

"I… I don't know what you're talking about." Alice was cute, he couldn't help but think. Only an idiot would not notice how stunning the young girl really she was, too be honest. She and Oz would look perfect together. _Why weren't they together?_ He couldn't help but wonder.

"Look, I know that even though the stupid seaweed hair, you're not actually stupid." She said,

"It's not seaweed. _"_

"Whatever. I figured, if the thing that's been keeping Oz up isn't ghosts from the past haunting him, it's… the _other thing_." By then, the teen was pretty sure he looked just as stupid as Alice thought he was, staring at her in confusion. Wondering to himself how Oz even managed to spend hours by the brunette's side and not once having trouble with understanding her. It was probably years of training; he admired the blond for his patience. When the brunette noticed he still wasn't following, she made an annoying 'tsk' sound. "Stupid déjà vu moments you idiot. Like you've met someone before or have been in a situation before. The clown says it's because…" she made some loose and bored gesture, "He believes in this theory of other worlds linked to ours."

For a second, he felt a rush of sadness go through him. The theory was too close to home, his mother had talked about it. _"I don't believe in god, I believe in angels and soulmates_."

There was a little piece of angel in every one of us, angels were _loyal_ , _selfless_ but also _strong_ , _kind_ , _pure_ and _innocent_. Soulmates were people you met in another universe before.

"I think Oz believes in it as well but is just too proud to admit it." The girl continued, perhaps she had not noticed how his mood had just changed, perhaps she simply did not care. Of all of Oz's friends, Alice had seemed to be struggling the most with accepting another person in their group of friends. Whenever he had tried talking to Oz in her presence, she had stayed close to him and demanded most of his attention. But she knew how important this new friendship between him and her childhood friend must be, so accepted it nonetheless. "When we were younger he told me all sorts of stories, Helen and Peter brushed them off as it all being just his imagination, but somehow I could recognize myself in his stories." She confessed, a sad look in her eyes. "He spoke of a twisted Wonderland and monsters making contracts with people, of Pandora's box and a world set in the Victorian era… and in this world, there was a man with the name Raven."

"M-me?"

She shrugged, " _Beats me_." She didn't care for herself, she only cared because it mattered to her friend. "Helen and Peter eventually send him to a psychiatrist because they were worried he'd eventually lose track of what's real and what's not. That's when he stopped talking about it, truth is… It didn't even cross my mind until now. Want to hear why I think that?"

He nodded, although a small voice coming from the back of his head screamed at her to shut-up, she was talking about things way above her head as if it was nothing. It felt like she was daring _–if there was a-_ god himself without a single care in the world. "Two days ago, Oz called me in the middle of the night. Simply asking me if I was okay."

"Huh?"

Her beautiful violet colored eyes appeared to be a few shades darker, clouded by her emotions. "He once told me he had a nightmare of me killing myself when we were younger, he could tell me every detail of how I did it. Said I looked much older back then, and that somehow… he was involved in my dead. It didn't take long for me to figure out that he must have had the same dream again. He sometimes gets these dreams, y'know… where everything seems so real, he has trouble with waking up. He doesn't want his parents to find out, says it'll only worry them."

He gulped, eyes wide and glued to the small girl in front of him, there was no more food left, she had eaten it all and now she was taking small sips of her milkshake. Her eyes were fixed on the windows, winter was coming closer with each passing day, making the days shorter and the nights longer. The sun had already gone down and all they could see was a dark street beautifully lit up by the streetlights and christmas decorations, their city liked to get ready for the holiday early. And with early he meant the beginning of November.

"You've already heard the stories, of that asshole that killed himself and dared to call himself Oz's friend."

He nodded, surprised by the hatred in her voice when she spoke of him. Whenever someone spoke of this person who used to be Oz's friend, they spoke of him like he was a ghost of the past. Afraid of even mentioning his name, worried that it could scatter the West's mood in a heartbeat. He had heard everyone speak of him except for Oz, who only mentioned something close to it in a vague tone once. And he only spoke of it because Gil had sort of gotten it out of him. Judging by the way of how protective Alice was over their mutual friend, he guessed she must hate the guy because of his suicide. Perhaps she was the kind of person that thought suicide was just a cowardly way of escaping responsibilities. Perhaps it was because everyone that knew the blond even a little bit, knew that he had not been the same person after his friend died, perhaps it was the pain that the boy's death had caused her friend that made her hate him. He didn't know and wasn't planning on judging her nor on figuring it out. Too afraid of what might happen once he knew the truth.

"Sometimes the past comes back to haunt him, I thought it was another episode of him. But it isn't… it's worse." Again, she turned her head to meet his gaze. As if she could read everything in his eyes. "And I know you figured this out as well."

"M-Me?" he blamed puberty for making his voice sound so high as he flinched, her glare made him feel nervous.

She nodded, there hung a tension between them.

One that was easily broken once she finished her milkshake and stole his, "O-oi! That's mine you stupid-rabbit!" he tried to get it back, he didn't mind losing his burger, he wasn't that hungry anyway, but the raven was a huge strawberry fan and would not stand for the brunette stealing his favorite drink.

"You said you'd treat me!" she protested while holding the drink out of his reach,

"Which I did!"

"Well what if I want more?"

"Then go get it yourself! I already treated you."

"Tsk. Cheap."

In the end, the two stopped fighting when they both heard an elderly couple chuckle and mumble something about _young love_ and _'remember when we used to fight like that, Charles?'_. They both made a gagging sound and decided it was time to leave anyway. In the end, the brunette kept happily drinking from her stolen drink. And he would hold a grudge for it for a long time.

They hesitated once outside the small MacDonald's, before they both walked towards the nearest bus stop once Gil got his bike and unlocked it. It turned out that both Oz and Alice lived a ten-minute ride away with the bus from school, but the girl was not a fan of crowded bussed so instead the two always walked to school. A walk that took them half an hour.

But walking alone in the dark was never safe for a girl alone. So he stayed with her until the bus arrived, the rest of their time mostly spend by fighting over stupid things.

"Hey, Alice…" he then asked once he saw the bus driving around the corner, getting closer and closer to where they stood. "Why did you tell me all this?" he asked softly, gazing at how his breath turned into clouds every time he breathed out.

"Because you'd understand." The girl admitted while holding out her hand, the bus stopped and opened it's doors. "Because Oz told me Raven would always remain by our sides." She then silently added. "See ya." She ignored the bus driver who grunted a 'good evening'.

"Alice!"

The driver made an annoyed noise but didn't close his doors just yet so that the girl could turn around, "Yeah?" she sounded slightly annoyed.

"Take care of Oz, so that he won't miss much of class. He told me he hates being sick."

She huffed, "Of course I will. Who do you take me for?" even though the arrogant tone in her voice, the smile she offered him was true and genuine. "Until Monday, seaweed-head."

"It's not seaweed."

"It does kind of look like seaweed, son." The driver agreed with her, "Now, are you two lovebirds done talking?"

Alice was too occupied with laughing her ass off to fully comprehend what he said, while Gilbert muttered a flustered 'we're not dating' under his breath.

"Whatever kid." The man shook his head and closed the doors, driving away. He saw Alice walk towards an empty seat and sit down.

The bus disappeared out of his sight, and Gilbert felt the first heavy droplet fall on his head. He grabbed his phone, seeing that his little date with Alice had taken him longer then expected.

* * *

By the time he arrived back home, he was drenched from head to toe and the lights were already out in his father's room. The only source of light he got when he entered the house was coming from their TV in the living room. His brother had been dozing off in front of the TV while hugging the rabbit doll Gil had given him when they were younger to his chest.

"Why are you still up?" he asked softly,

"Why are you so late?" came the quick response, Vincent never broke eye contact with the screen.

"I had some trouble with my bike, had to walk all the way home." He sighed, after he had dropped Alice at the bus stop, he had managed to ride his bike for a good five minutes before his breaks decided to no longer work. He knew riding your bike in the dark and in the rain was asking for trouble, so he walked the rest home. While Alice and Oz lived a good half an hour walk away from school, Gil had no such luck. Riding to school by bike already took him a good thirty minutes, walking could take up to an hour or two. Not to mention he had stopped at one point to hide from the rain, hoping it would stop eventually, after more then half an hour waiting he had given up on that and just walked through the pouring rain.

"Dad says you need to do the dishes alone, cuz you're late." Vincent said, he yawned and changed the channel.

He nodded, "I'm gonna take a shower first though."

"Yeah, you kind of look like a drowned cat." His brother agreed even though his gaze had not once left the TV, he looked almost bored. But Gil knew his brother well enough; he recognized the signs of a troubled Vincent like no other.

"What's troubling you?" he asked, wondering if his father had noticed there must have been something troubling Vince and if he had chosen to ignore or it, Gil hoped his father simply hadn't noticed.

The man had always been terrible at reading the atmosphere that was something their mother did. And while he had promised he'd make it up to them, now that he was working two jobs a day, he could barely pay attention to his children.

"Another break-up?" honestly, Gil had lost track of his brother's girlfriends a long time ago. He knew Vince only dated people to kill time, knew that this way of thinking wasn't right, _"They come to me, asking me to give them a chance. Who am I to deny them this simple request?_ " not once had the other Raven sibling been upset after a break-up, since he was the one breaking up with them.

"I broke up with her two weeks ago." Vincent answered bored, "No, brother. I wouldn't get upset over Ann." So this time it was an Ann.

"So…" he hummed while getting a towel out of the kitchen, they had spare towels out of the bathroom in their kitchen for occasions like this, when it would suddenly start raining and one of them forgot an umbrella. Their mother checked the weather everyday. _Some habits are just hard to break_. Not that the three men living under the same room ever wanted to break those habits. Every time they forgot something or noticed something his mother would usually do, it reminded them of her. Tiny details that showed them she had not left completely out of their lives. "What is it then?"

Vincent didn't answer. Instead he changed the channel again and decided that tonight he would waste his patience on following a Spanish drama series.

Gilbert sighed and instead headed towards the bathroom upstairs to take a quick warm shower and change into his pajamas.

When he got back down, his brother was still gazing with the same bored eyes at the screen, watching a man and woman make out passionately while a crowd was cheering in the background.

He was already halfway in the kitchen before the blond spoke again, "Do you know this… girl, Aida Vesalius?" Vincent said her name as if she was some venomous snake that needed to be eliminated.

He knew Aida, but only from what he had heard. The girl was almost as popular and loved as Oz, she was the head of their small newspaper club and made sure everything looked perfect. Whenever Oz wasn't spending time on his photography and nowhere near his friends, he was at her side. Discussing things for in the next issue. Her sharp eye for details and harmony and his talent made them a perfect team. Only once had he seen her in real life, when she had been talking to Elliot while the others had been waiting for them to finish. He could still remember the way the Nightray's face at some point had heated up and how this had made the girl very flustered as well.

" _She's apologizing,"_ Leo had smirked in amusement.

" _How much you wanna bet she asked if he could sing at the schooldance again?"_ Oz had asked with a vicious smile,

Leo smirked, " _It wouldn't be really a bet if we're both on the same team."_

" _Actually, she complimented his clothing_." Echo had quietly said. Which had led to Alice, Leo and Oz staring at her in amazement.

Aida Vesalius was beautiful in the stunning way; it was obvious she didn't even had to try to look cute. Neither could you hate her, since the girl was always so nice and treated everyone with the same amount of respect. At some point, the raven had thought she'd make a good friend for Sharon.

"I know her, yes."

"She came to me today."

" _Oh_?"

Vincent's voice didn't change, yet he could somehow tell that whatever it was Aida had asked him, the Raven had not been happy with it. "She wants to interview me."

"That is… _nice_?"

"It's really not, brother." Vincent whined, his voice finally betraying him. "She wanted to interview me about the upcoming school ball. I couldn't care less about the stupid thing. It's a bother."

"So…. You refused?" He didn't quite get what exactly it was that upset his brother about his encounter with the Vesalius.

"I tried. But she just…" Vincent sighed, as if the memory alone was exhausting. "She started rambling about why the school ball is so important and bla, bla, bla and I just wanted her to shut-up and agreed to her stupid interview."

Gilbert chuckled in amusement, impressed by the thought of a girl actually managing to convince his brother to do something. Vincent was used to doing his own thing and not listening to what others said. It was what got him into trouble in their previous school and what led to him having to spend the rest of November in detention. Well, at least Vince did his homework in detention, so that was a win.

"I have to meet with her tomorrow, at ten." Vincent then continued, " _Ten_. _"_ He groaned. Ah, another sore spot. Vincent liked to sleep in,

Gil snorted in amusement, "Be on time."

His sibling finally sat up, "Can't you call her? Tell her I'm sick."

"Vince, you made a promise." he scolded his younger sibling.

The blond narrowed his eyes, Gil had just betrayed him. Something he would not forget, "Fine." He huffed.

"Fine?" he raised a single eyebrow, surprised by how easily his brother gave in.

"If Gil wants me to see that stupid girl tomorrow, I'll go."

" _Huh_ … okay. Have fun."

"I'm sleeping in your bed tonight."

Yep. He should have seen that one coming, Gilbert sighed but decided to keep his mouth shut. Instead he started to clean the dishes. In his head, he was already making a list of what he had to do tomorrow; fixing his bike came on top of it.

When he was done with his little chore, his brother had already turned off the TV and headed upstairs. Gilbert got his phone out of the pocket of his pants and send a quick text to Oz.

"Feeling better?"

It was late, he really didn't expect a reply so soon, but not a minute had passed before his phone went off again.

While the sender was Oz's phone, the picture attached to the phone was of a tired looking Oz smiling amused at his mother who seemed to be in the middle of telling a story. "He's fine. Stop worrying or you'll lose all your seaweed hair. –A" it seemed that Alice kept her promise and took good care of the West.

Gilbert smiled, silently hoping Oz would be better by Monday.


	7. Echo: A week without you

**I don't own Pandora Hearts**

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Oz did not show up at school on Monday. And honestly, this shouldn't have been much of a surprise. Echo had seen the blond in the previous week, he had looked absolutely terrible. Ever since she met the young West, she knew he had trouble with sleeping. The symptoms were as clear as day to her, it takes one to know one after all.

The young girl gazed at Oz's friends from a safe distance, she had never been much of a fan of interacting with people. She'd rather keep a safe distance while keeping an eye out on what happened around her.

This was how Echo preferred to live.

When exactly had it happened, she wondered; suddenly this boy with beautiful blond hair had entered her life and with him came the sun that made all of her dark thoughts disappear. She had found his presence annoying at first. The young male had this terrible habit of showing up at the most unexpected times. Like that one time her family had dragged her to the carnival and he had just popped up from out of nowhere, asking her if she wanted to tag along with him for a while, since Alice kind of ditched him back then for food.

At some point, Oz's presence had turned into something else then a nuisance. Suddenly she looked forward to seeing him the next day, she wanted nothing more then for him to keep talking about the stuff he liked. Echo couldn't even count the amount of times she had told the blond to leave her alone, while the truth was, she was having the time of her life when he asked her about her day or if something was bugging her, the genuine interest she saw each day in his eyes made her heart flutter and her hands clammy.

And then he got sick again, it was different then back in their freshmen year, back then, Oz been in a terrible state, back then, the girl had been convinced he'd never get better. The West had surprised everyone with his fast recovery.

Echo feared that this time, her dear Oz wouldn't be able to get better on his own. Alice told everyone to give him some space, that this is what the West wants. But how could she be sure?

Zwei often told Echo she wanted to be alone when she was upset, when she really meant that someone should go after her to comfort her. The older twin had never understood this, at first it was always her mother that went after her younger sibling, until the older woman got so mad at Echo for not understanding her sister's needs that now she had to do it.

Echo was never a fan of interacting with Oz's friends, they were noisy and did a lot of stupid things. She was sure they knew this, that probably explained why Elliot suddenly halted his sentence when he noticed she had joined them three days later.

"Ah…" his eyes widened slightly and he exchanged a quick look with his best friend Leo, Echo was just pondering to herself if she had made a mistake and should leave before Alice spoke, of all of Oz's friends, Echo liked the brunette the most. Mostly because she was the boy's childhood friend and knew him best, she knew best what Oz wanted. Alice, just like their mutual friend, liked to push herself on people and keep bugging them until they eventually had no choice but to accept them in their life. Over the years, Echo had come to like her.

"Ekko, was it right?" Elliot then asked,

"It's Echo!" the girl snapped, ignoring the pang of anger that welled from deep within her, the only person who was allowed to call her that was Oz.

"Sorry." The taller teen didn't appear that sorry, "Oz is sick-"

"I know." She said, wondering if she should perhaps try to be more friendly, she could try to smile. Yet her voice and facial expression remained the same. The girl knew this was a mistake, of course they would think she came to see Oz, of course-

"Echo could do it." Leo then said out of the blue,

Alice, Gil and Elliot gave the raven haired teen a confused look, even though it was hard to see through Leo's thick glasses, the girl still noticed he rolled his eyes before he answered, he turned himself towards the smaller girl, "Oz won't be coming to school for a whole week, but we have some books and papers that he needs. Alice can't do it, so you would like to do it?"

No way! The girl instantly started panicking.

"It's easy, really. I'll give you the address, just give him the stuff and leave. He'll probably look like shit anyway and be too tired to do much." Alice added,

"U-unless you don't want to, in which case… I could do it?" Gilbert offered kindly, ah, that's right. For some reason, Vincent's older brother had suddenly decided to become best friends with Oz. Really it shouldn't be a wonder, everyone wanted to be Oz's friends. But Echo was no fool, while the blond appeared to be open and kind to everyone, he rarely let anyone become a friend. Echo, Break and Anton were the only new people he added to his small group of friends when he entered high school, the others he already knew since childhood.

"What the hell seaweed head? I just told you you I need you."

"My hair is not seaweed you stupid rabbit! Besides, like hell I want to accompany a rude potty-mouthed girl!" the senior immediately snapped back, to which both Elliot and Leo sighed. They had already gotten used to this sort of behavior between the two.

"It's gotten worse now that Oz is gone," Elliot said,

"Perhaps we should call Sharon, she seems to know what to do in these situations."

They exchanged a knowing look with each other,

"But anyway!" Leo handed her a heavy bag filled with schoolwork meant for Oz, "We'll be counting on you!"

The bell rang and the stunned girl watched in confusion how the small group of friends broke apart. No one had asked her if this was alright. She didn't want to go to Oz's house-

.

And yet, there she stood. Her hands holding onto the bag as if her life depended on it while she waited for someone to open the door. She had just rang the bell and had almost started running when she heard how loud it was. Truthfully, the girl hoped Oz would be sleeping, perhaps his mother or father would open the door and accept the bag and then let her go. Alice had told her she could always drop the bag off at her house in case they didn't open, then her siblings would take care of it.

Honestly, the girl could have always just knocked on Alice's door instead and pretend that she had tried but no one had opened at Oz's house.

Why hadn't she done that?

 _Because she wanted to see him_. More then anything, she just wanted to see his face and see for herself that he was getting better, that this short break of school would help him.

Her heart almost jumped out of her chest when she heard a door from inside the house open and the soft sound of bare feet tapping against the floor. Trough the blurry glass of the door she could see the silhouette of a small teen. In the few seconds that Oz needed to unlock the door and open it, Echo made up a quick plan to flee. She of course froze as soon as she met his bemused gaze.

"Little Ekko!" a smile found its way on his face and it seemed to light up his whole face,

"Just Echo!"

He laughed while he got a quick hand through his messy hair, he looked better she noticed, as if he had caught up on a lot of sleep, but she still noticed that he looked troubled. "So you're the victim huh?" he then joked while stepping aside and made some loose gesture for her to come in. She did, her movements slow and unsure. Her gaze immediately fell on the many pictures decorating the lime painted walls.

Her heart fluttered every time she found one with Oz on it, even on pictures he looked handsome.

"Echo really didn't want to come," she then flat out said, following her friend into what looked like the dining room. "They just pushed this bag into my hands and ran off." She held out said bag, which Oz took with an amused smile.

"Did they now? I'm sorry to hear that." He hummed, "Would you like to drink something?"

"Ah no, I should be-"she stopped though, the girl gave Oz a quick look. His hair was messier then usual and he wore a simple grey jogging and white shirt. His skin was paler and he had dark bags resting under his eyes. The girl was terrible at comforting people, she once offered her sister candy to cheer her up, Zwei had gotten even more angry and had thrown it at her head while shouting, "I'm not a kid you brat!"

Yet she couldn't help but want to be there for Oz, she wanted to hug him and tell him everything was alright. This was Oz, after all. He shouldn't be looking like he wanted to give up, like life no longer held any meaning to him. Of all people, not him. Oz should be smiling and telling her everything will be alright, he'd make some silly joke or take her somewhere fun. How do you even help someone who always helps others?

"S-some tea, please." She finally uttered, almost tripping over her words.

He nodded and she knew she had said the right thing.

"So how's school?" he asked over his shoulder while he headed towards the kitchen, "Oh, you can put your stuff on a chair if you want to," the teen quickly added while grabbing their water boiler.

Echo removed her scarf and jacket and threw it over a chair, she placed her schoolbag on the kitchen table and followed her friend into the small kitchen. It was barely large enough for more then four people to work here at the same time.

"Fine."

He hummed and put on the water boiler once he had put water in it, he held up a box with teabags, asking her which she wanted.

"a-ah… uhm… Mint."

There fell an awkward silence between the two when Oz grabbed two cups from the cupboard, Echo couldn't help but grow uneasy with every passing second until she could no longer stand it, "Are you alright?" she then blurted out. The water boiler had just finished, Oz had already reached out towards the machine before he froze, eyes big as he met her gaze. Her face was heating up because of what she had just asked. She could just hit herself! That was really not a way to start a conversation.

Then why had she done it?

 _Why_?

She felt her body temperature drastically change though when she saw how easily he covered his surprise up as if he put on a mask right in front of her, it was obvious he had trained for this question.

"I'm fine."

 _Fine_.

He turned his back towards her to pour the boiling hot water in the two cups,

No… she shook her head, without even thinking about it, Echo reached out her hand to Oz, but since his hands were occupied, all she could grab was his shirt. He looked over his shoulder as soon as he felt her hand grasp his piece of clothing.

"Why… why, you of all people…" the girl murmured, she lowered her head so that he could not see her sorrowful expression even though she knew he could probably hear it in her voice. "Yo-you shouldn't be like this. You should be happy… and… You can't be sad!" the girl sighed while she rested her head between his shoulder blades.

The boy just stood there, he softly whispered her name, and Echo couldn't feel more stupid then at that very right moment.

She felt her face heat up as she took a small step away from him so that he could turn around to face her.

The young West offered her a kind smile, "Thanks."

Her heart skipped a beat, Oz handed her a cup and headed back into the dining room where he took a seat at the small wooden table nearby the window.

Echo followed, albeit a bit unsure. She took the seat across from him, her eyes scanned absentminded over the childish handwriting in glitter pen. The young girl was more then sure she had crossed some sort of line; this wasn't anything like her. She hated it, whenever Oz was involved Echo would lose her cool and say stupid things. Only he could make her so nervous and make her stumble over her own words.

She wanted to cry. The girl glanced at Oz and saw he had a sorrowful expression as he gazed outside, from here you had a perfect view over the their garden.

She saw a large walnut tree and not much further stood what looked like a handmade swing, it looked old and worn out. Did they still use it? She wondered if Alice and Oz had sat on it when they were younger and the weather was much warmer, unlike now; with the sun hidden behind dark clouds, looking like it would rain anytime soon now.

Echo stood up abruptly, hands already going towards her jacket "I-I should probably go." This had been a mistake, she should have just handed him the bag with homework and then headed back home.

"Ah no, I'm sorry!" Oz stood up as well and quickly grabbed her wrist, even though his haste and obvious wish for her to stay, his touch still remained loose and gentle. He didn't want to hurt her.

Echo looked at his hand, she had always thought his hands were beautiful, those hands had held hers so many times, she had seen how those hands had made beautiful art.

Oz looked down as well, neither knew when exactly they had intertwined their fingers, his face heated up as fast as hers and they both let go. "A-ah sorry!" the boy chuckled awkwardly, "I-I don't want you to leave, I-I'm sorry if I gave off the wrong impression… I just," he sighed and awkwardly scratched the back of his head, "I just spaced out for a second…"

The girl let out a soft breath, she gave him a quick up and down look before she answered, "About what's bothering you?" Her tone flat of emotion, she felt calmer somehow. She knew she was right when she caught surprise in Oz's eyes. "I could listen to what's troubling you." She offered, "I… might be terrible at giving advice, but I could listen."

Oz's smile was beautiful, he sat down again and held his cup with both hands. "I… stress over things way too easily," the blond finally said after a long silence, a shy smile on his lips as he spoke. While stress was something many people seemed to struggle with on a daily basis, Echo still had the feeling that her friend was telling her a secret. He seemed so insecure about what he was telling her and his voice had become much softer. "…Ever since I was young… and it gives me nightmares,"

"You're not sick?" She concluded,

The blond shook his head, "...sometimes my stress is worse then other days… and then the nightmares appear on a daily basis, last week… I could barely sleep because of them." He sighed, she saw some tension leave his body the more he spoke, "My nightmares always seem so much more real when they're caused by… stress, I…-I know it might sound like nothing, even I find it ridiculous but the doctor still decided to give me a week off…"

He tried to explain it to her, he didn't want for her to think of him as weak or pathetic.

How could she ever think of him like that?

She sat down again and placed her hand over his, he gasped softly and met her gaze. His eyes were beautiful and Echo was sure, that at that very right moment it couldn't only be her that felt something.

"Zwei makes dreamcatchers, I've heard they help for nightmares." She deadpanned.

She saw how he furrowed his brow in confusion before he burst out in a bubbly laughter.

"Thanks, I'll keep it in mind. But I'm fine now… just very tired, my doctor has given me some pills, I don't dream when I take them."

Echo nodded, a small smile appeared, she shyly looked away and did not catch the star struck look on Oz's face when he saw her smile.

There rested a comfortable silence between them, Oz eventually grabbed the papers Echo had brought with her and went through them, it was only Wednesday, so more would come. Honestly, Echo didn't even understand why she had to bring him those papers, neither was she able to understand why Alice couldn't have just given them herself. Even if the girl had something to do later that day, she could still give the papers to Oz when she'd get back, no?

The young teen gazed at the boy sitting in front of her, he still looked absolutely stunning, even though his pale skin and the bags beneath his eyes. This was the first time she saw Oz like that, Echo realized.

He was home and dressed like it was a lazy Sunday, wearing a loose grey color jogging and a worn out white teacher that had the Kellogg's logo on it.

Would he have changed if he knew she was coming?

Oz was always dressed up so nicely when she saw him outside of his home, but Echo preferred him this way. In a way, it made him look more human. After all, her friend was seen by many as a Wonder child, Oz had many talents. He was in the school's top ten best students, was a great artist, played more then three instruments and so responsible. He was the child every teacher dreamt of and each day had to live up to that image, not a single day went by wherein he could just be himself, where he was just… Oz.

So yes, Echo liked to see him in a jogging and messed up hair instead of the character people expected him to be.

"Echo?"

She blinked, her face remained natural yet she could feel her cheeks heating up once again as she realized she had been gazing a bit too long at her crush.

And Oz smiled, a beautiful smile that revealed two rows of perfect white teeth. His eyes had this beautiful spark in them when he smiled and she was sure that even Alice's heart skipped a beat every time she saw it, because there was no way you could ever get used to it.

"I asked if there's anything special I missed in classes?"

Ah, she hadn't really been paying much attention in class. "Miss Detri is pregnant."

He laughed, "I actually meant about studying, but that's nice. I'll congratulate her when I get back,"

The young girl could just kick herself, she wanted to make up an excuse if she hadn't noticed Oz's suddenly sitting up straighter as he looked over her shoulder at the doorway that lead to the living room.

Behind her, she heard someone entering the house. She heard the sound of keys clattering and the ruffling sound of someone removing their jacket while they walked in the living room, "Oz, I'm home and brought ingredients for pizza!" a middle-aged man said while holding up a bag with the brand of a nearby store. "Who's your friend?" Oz's father then asked with a curious look.

Oz didn't look like his father, Peter was tall and slender, his skin was pale and both his eyes and hair were dark brown. His clothes were comfy and looked in no way stylish, there was no way anyone would guess that this stay-at-home man was a bestselling author and more importantly, Oz's father.

"Echo, my name is Echo." she introduced herself quickly, not sure if she should stand up and offer him her hand, now that she thought of it, this was actually the first time she stayed over at a friend's house.

"Ah so you're Eko? Oz has told me so much about you." Peter laughed,

"Dad!" Echo didn't even bother correcting the man, too flustered now that she knew Oz had talked about her to his parents,

"Nice to meet you, I'm Peter." His jacket lay forgotten on the smallest sofa as he entered the dining room linked to their kitchen, "Are you staying for dinner, Eko?"

"Ah no thanks, I don't want to intrude."

"Oh really, it's no bother! I always buy extra food in case Alice joins us for dinner, but she told me she's eating out with that Gilbert guy." he placed all of his groceries on the wooden table and told Oz to get all the stuff they needed to make pizzas, "Heat up the oven as well! 180, the usual." He then turned his attention back to Echo, "Ever since that guy joined them, he's become all they've been talking about. Gil this, Gil that. Apparently he has seaweed hair, what does that even look like, I wonder."

He smiled when his son returned with way too much supplies then they actually needed, Peter loved to talk, Echo soon learned, and just like Oz, Echo didn't mind him talking so much, he had a pleasant voice to listen to and his stories were interesting.

Echo couldn't refuse their request to join them for dinner and thus helped them make pizzas, it turned out that Peter was an average cook and Helen, his wife was the true artist in the kitchen, so they told her. Oz was terrible in the kitchen, so Pete warned her to keep a good eye on him, because apparently Oz was so terrible he could even manage to ruin something as basic as pizza. A compliment Oz did not like to receive.

And Echo smiled softly, enjoying the atmosphere that hung around the house.

They made three big pizzas, and by the time dinner was ready and the table was all set, Helen showed up as well. She complained about Peter throwing his jacket in their living room and scolded Oz in a light hearted tone because he had forgotten one of his chores. But still, she kissed her husband on his lips and ruffled her son's messy hair before leaning down and placing a kiss on his forehead. A tradition she must do each day because Oz didn't seem flustered at all.

Echo couldn't find any resemblance between Oz and Helen either, Helen's hair was a light color of blond while Oz's looked more golden, her eyes were a pale blue as was her skin a few shades paler. Both Peter and Helen had an average height while Oz was below average. She remembered how insecure he had been about it in freshmen, but how he hadn't stood out that much because there were many other kids that still hadn't caught up with the others, but back then, Oz had been thirteen going to fourteen, now he was turning sixteen in a month and remained stuck on the same height as back then, perhaps he had grown a few centimeters but not impressive much.

In their freshmen year, Oz had been befriended with Anton, a tall and broad guy, she remembered how many people had joked about Anton looking like Oz's bodyguard rather then just a friend.

She took a bite of her own piece of pizza as she thought back about this friendly guy that Oz had taken under his wing and had ended up befriending, how broken Oz had been when their friend had taken his own life.

She had overheard Alice Monday talking to Break, the two of them together would always be an odd sight, so of course her twin Zwei couldn't help but stop to overhear what they were talking about, both had only heard small parts of their conversation but it was enough for them to realize that the brunette was worried Oz might have nightmares about losing Anton again.

Oz had looked even worse then he did now, he hadn't showed up at school for a whole month and when he came back, he suddenly had to follow all those new rules.

The photography group no longer existed after Anton's death, no one wanted to take pictures anymore. And suddenly Oz had to take all of the pictures to represent their school, in return he could skip P.E. He never participated in school events, always watched from the sidelines, face hidden behind a camera and capturing every moment.

It had took him time, but slowly Oz got better.

It was then that Break as well showed interest in the boy, for months, the albino hadn't even offered them a second look when they passed each other in the hallways, and all off sudden Break spend an awful lot of time by Oz's side.

" _He shared one of his own stories to make Oz feel better, apparently_." Alice had told her, " _It's weird to imagine Break sharing one of his own stories to make someone realize they're not the only one suffering and that there are people who'll understand, y'know?_ "

Agreed.

"Oh I know what we can play!" Helen said once dinner was over, "Cluedo! It's been so long since we played it,"

"If it's no trouble for our guest that is, when do you have to be home?" Peter had asked,

"8pm,"

"Perfect, don't worry, we'll give you a ride back home. Gives us just enough time for one game." Helen shot up from her seat and left to get the game while telling her husband and son that they should clean up.

And when everything was set, they played the game.

Echo looked at Oz, and knew that she could trust him. There was no way Oz had fallen back into whatever it was he had fallen into back in their freshmen year. She knew she could believe him when he told her it was just some nightmares caused by stress. She realized that whatever it was that was troubling him, he was going to get better and she had worried for nothing.

Oz was fine.

She smiled.


	8. Oz: The things I've dreamt about you

**Here's another update, in case you guys missed the previous one ^^'**

 **I do not own Pandora Hearts.**

 **Please leave a review, it's reviews that keep my writing after all. I didn't get much feedback on the previous chapter which kind of upset me... .-.**

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 _"Don't touch me, you vile creature."_

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Oz gasped for air as he sat up straight in his bed, he was covered in a thin layer of sweat. He looked around his dark room, trying to remember where he was, it took him a good few minutes to comprehend he wasn't dreaming anymore. Yet the words still lingered inside his mind and left an awful taste in his mouth. He felt nauseous and longed for nothing more then to forget everything he had just dreamt, only he knew… knew that this wasn't just a dream. There was no way it could have been. It all seemed so real.

He felt like crying, he truly did. For the first time in years, the boy wanted to do nothing more then to cry and let it all out. Perhaps he'd feel a lot better if he'd just let down all of his walls, safe inside of the four walls of his own bedroom in the middle of the night, with only the shadows to see him break. Who was there to judge him then?

But instead, he took a few deep breaths and felt himself slowly calm down. This wasn't the first time after all that he woke up bathing in sweat and feeling utterly lost.

 _Gil_

There was no way that what he had just seen could be true he told himself. Even though the dream felt all too real and looked like a memory, there was no way it could have been real.

 _It isn't real, it isn't real…_ he kept telling himself.

And yet… this wasn't the first dream he had of Victorian houses, of dukes and politics, of being locked up in a room… with no one to save him. He had dreamt so many times of mansions being on fire and people screaming, people clad in crimson cloaks pointing with accusing fingers at him.

But those had always been short, and they'd jump from one horror to another. While this dream had seemed like a scene cut out of a movie.

And he had been the main character; curled up in a ball, Oz had been much younger then he was now and something had finally pushed him closer to the edge. Most of his walls had crumpled down and there was barely anything left, but there was Gil; asking him what was wrong.

" _Hey Gil… I wonder why father hates me now."_

 _"Young master, if you feel that way why don't we just ask him?"_

 _"No way!"_ he bit his lip and shut his eyes, trying to push the memory away, but no matter how hard he tried it wouldn't leave, _"I'm frightened of the truth-"_ he had already known the truth.

He was heir to a great household, but a child nonetheless and the thought of being burdened with such a high responsibility without a parent to guide him was horrifying. But this is what made Oz realize they were just dreams, because there was no way anyone could live like that.

He stumbled out of his bed, not caring about the ruckus he caused as he got to the bathroom as fast as possible, the teen barely made it, he fell down on his knees and emptied his stomach in the toilet.

Behind him he could hear the sound of bare feet tapping against the tiled floor. He had just enough time to catch his breath before he threw up again… and again, until there was nothing left but stomach fluids.

"Oh sweety…" his mother sighed behind him, she placed a gentle hand on his shoulder to gently guide him away from the toilet, letting him lean onto her. She had kneeled down and was now at his eyelevel.

Oz had always hated the way she'd furrow her brow with worry whenever something bad happened to him, he had always hated how easily she worried about him. How worry could lead to stress, and how stress had a huge influence on her work.

He didn't pay much attention to his father who moved around the bathroom while his mother gently caressed his damp hair out of his face, "You have a fever, should we take you to the hospital?"

The blond shook his head, hospitals only carried terrible memories with them. And he refused to go back to them unless absolutely needed. He knew this fever would pass, just like the stress eventually.

"Sweety… this can't go on for much longer, have you taken your medicine?"

He couldn't remember, he remembered that after they dropped Echo off, he had watched a movie with his parents and had eventually gotten tired, he didn't know if he had remembered to take his pills or not. If he hadn't, he was now carrying the consequences.

"I don't know…" he finally admitted, "M'sorry."

"It's nothing to be sorry over," Peter smiled and gently ruffled his son's hair before handing him a cold glass with water, "let's go downstairs I'll prepare some tea,"

He met his father's gaze, and the young West felt himself calm down immediately. Because the father of his dreams looked nothing like the man sitting in front of him, he did not look at him as if he was filth. No, Peter's eyes were filled with love. He truly cared about his son.

He offered his father a weak smile back and nodded,

Peter nodded and headed downstairs while Helen stayed behind, making sure that he wouldn't fall and to check if the situation wasn't worse then they thought. The nightmares had once caused for him to end up in a hospital, he couldn't blame her for being worried.

"Would you like to talk about it?" she asked after a while,

She didn't push when he told her no, he knew there was no use in lying or trying to talk himself out of it, so that was all he could offer her as an answer. Instead he told her he'd take a quick shower and would then join Peter downstairs, "You should go back to sleep though, you have work tomorrow."

"I'm the owner of said job, I'm sure I can open a bit later if that means I get to make sure my son is alright."

"I'm fine,"

"Oh but you're not," she let out a dramatic sigh and pulled him in a tight embrace, "Just thinking about my poor baby being hurt makes me feel terribly distressed!"

He chuckled in amusement, knowing that Helen was only trying to cheer him up. The blonde winked at her son and finally got up to get a clean pair of pajamas for him.

She returned in a short time and handed him the new clothes before she joined her husband downstairs.

Oz took a cold shower, his skin felt like it was on fire. Taking a shower helped, it helped him clear his thoughts. He fell almost completely better when he finally went downstairs only to find his mother had made her special hot cacao with whipped cream and small pieces of marshmallows.

"Don't get used to it though," she reminded him with a kind smile,

"I don't think anyone could ever get used to your _this_." Peter protested, he took a seat next to the his son, "Now son, I need you to know nightmares can be unpleasant, but they're nothing to be worried about, 'cuz you see I once dreamt of kissing a toad and turning into one myself, and believe me when I tell you…" and his father was off to tell him one of his many unbelievable stories, neither Helen nor Oz had it in them to stop him though. Because no matter how ridiculous the story, Peter always had a way of making it interesting, no matter what the topic. So they listened, with half amused smiles on their faces and only the light of a few candles to illuminate their faces.

Somewhere in the background, the clock read three in the morning, and none of that mattered. For them time had stopped.

* * *

When he went back to bed, he dreamt of a sunny day, holding the much smaller hand of a younger sister as he watched a casket slowly getting lowered into the ground. When he looked up, he saw the father that had called him vile look at the new grave with sadness and rage.

He couldn't read what was written on the grey stone, that's how he knew it was just a dream, people can't read in them. And yet... he somehow knew, what it said;

 _here lies Rachel Vesalius, loving mother of Oz & Aida Vesalius, wife of Zai Vesalius. May the four angels watch over her_.

His mother- they were burying his mother.

And again, the blond woke up bathing in his own sweat. This time he could see the sun slowly rising, telling him that a new day had come. Oz let out a soft and pitiful sound, wishing that the dreams would just stop.

He knew what had triggered them, but wasn't so sure if he was willing to sacrifice said reason if that meant he would no longer have these dreams.

* * *

Oz returned after a complete week of absence. Alice had warned him that things might be a bit chaotic. It was only when Oz was gone from school that people started to realize just how much they relied on him, students relied on him for his notes and his knowledge, they knew he'd always be there for them if they needed help. Teachers knew him as the student who always had all of his stuff with him and knew the answers to almost every question they asked. The newspaper club relied on him for pictures and if Aida was too busy, they'd go to him for help with their articles.

And to his friends… Oz was the center of the group, the one who always knew how to keep a conversation going, the one who made you feel better about yourself because no matter what you talked about, he always showed you genuine interest.

So of course when the blond returned to school, it was no wonder that people swarmed around him like bees around their queen.

Teachers told him they were glad he finally got better, he got ten different notes from the same class and students offered to go over the topic with him if he needed help.

But what pleased him the most was joining Elliot and Leo's side, unlike everyone else, they barely looked up from their conversation. While it was obvious that the two had missed him, they weren't the type to overwhelm him with questions. Leo offered Oz a kind smile as a way of greeting, the same one he offered the teen every morning, and Elliot nodded.

And then there was Gil, as soon as the raven had noticed his presence he had albeit run towards him.

"You're back!"

"Seems like it," the blond joked, one eyebrow raised in amusement.

"A-ah yeah, I mean, of course you're back, O-otherwise you wouldn't be here?" the older teen let out a nervous laugh, behind the raven stood Break. He kept an eye on them while keeping a safe distance between them, and when Oz met the albino's gaze, a shill ran down his spine. Knowing all too well why Break had decided to tag along with the raven instead of remaining by Sharon and Reim their sides.

His phone buzzed in the pocket of his pants.

Oz barely paid attention to Gil who kept on rambling, probably making the situation even more awkward for himself. Usually the young West would have made fun of him for it, but now all he focused on was the text message he had received.

- **12.30pm. library** \- _Break_

"….wants us to sing Taylor Swift, can you believe it- oi, Oz are you listening?"

"h-huh?"

Elliot seemed close to punching him,

"A-ah sorry," he laughed, "I must have spaced out, what were you talking about?"

"About the winter ball, the principal asked us to perform, _remember_?"

He nodded, so Elliot continued, "He let the students vote which songs we had to play and the list has Taylor Swift on it."

"Elliot's favorite performer," Leo added with a sly smirk

To which the Nightray snapped, "Shut-up Leo, you know it's not!"

"She totally is, you're just too ashamed to admit it." Oz exchanged an evil grin with Leo, and the teasing began. Until Elliot was a flustered muttering mess. The bell rang which led to an end of the poor teen's suffering.

And while Oz headed to his class, Gilbert stayed behind, watching his retreating back, he kept gazing at him until the crowd made him disappear.

"You're worried." Break noted,

To which Gil nodded, unsure if he could rely on his voice. For a moment, he had been scared that Oz would ignore him. But he had greeted him like any other time and had acted like nothing had happened. So his fear must have been for naught?

Somehow, that didn't sound so convincing.


	9. Gil: You really love him(her

**I don't own Pandora Hearts.**

 **Please tell me if you find any spelling mistakes,**

 **And as always, reviews make me more eager to write ^^**

* * *

Gilbert was no fool, he knew that while Oz had accepted him as a friend and let him enter his inner circle; there still was a certain distance between them. The young West kept a safe distance from everyone around him. The only person Gil guessed that knew how to climb over Oz's walls was Alice. Which wasn't an odd thing, knowing that the two have known each other for so long. Alice even confessed rather bluntly that she still changed clothes in the same room as her childhood friend and wasn't bothered by it at all.

Oz carried many secrets, his sudden absence of a week being a good example. So when the young Raven noticed Break's sudden interest in the blond once he had returned, he couldn't help but end up being curious.

The raven caught wind of Oz and Break's rendezvous in the library, and for a second he felt the need to follow and spy on them. But instead he sat on their usual spot on the stairs that led to a forbidden floor in their school. Reim had yet to arrive so it was only him and Sharon.

"It's a touchy subject, so perhaps you'd like to hear the whole story so that you'll know what to avoid next time?" Sharon offered when their conversation somehow ended at Oz absence.

"I-If… you don't mind." He had agreed,

"Oh, not at all. I was an outsider in the whole incident after all. Break somehow made sure of that." She took small bites of her food, every move Sharon made was graceful and made it hard not to look. He realized not for the first time, just how beautiful she was.

"I think what made Alice so worried about is that this case looked very familiar with the one from back in our freshmen years. You see, back then Oz had a friend named Anton. He was a very tough looking guy but with a heart of gold." Sharon sighed when she thought back of the boy, "I never got a chance to talk to him properly, Break loathed him like the pest and made sure he kept a distance from me. Anton got bullied for his looks and sexual preferences," when she noticed Gil's confused look, she smiled kindly at him. The same way his mother had smiled at him, a look that told the raven, no matter how much questions he had, no matter how long it would take for him to understand; Sharon would remain patient and give him all the answers he needed. "He was gay, Gilbert."

"O….Oh," he nodded, and then remembered Elliot bringing up Anton used to be a good friend of Oz, not just any friend… Anton was someone Oz had been very fond of. "D-does that mean Oz is… as well?" his heart started to beat faster, he didn't know why he had this sudden urge to know. He had never been interested in anyone's preferences.

"Gay?" Sharon pondered about this, her ponytail had gotten messy, Gilbert watched as she let her hair loose so that she could put it up again, "I don't think so," she admitted. Sharon looked less mature with her hair down he noticed. This wasn't the first time that Gilbert noticed she wore clothes that didn't look like something someone her age should wear. While it was true that Sharon was very mature for her age, he wondered if this wasn't just a façade she kept up. For Break perhaps?

"I've known Oz for a long time now, and he's only ever shown interest in girls." She chuckled, the topic must have brought up some funny memory, "He used to have a crush on me, you know?" a sigh escaped her lips as she thought back of the fond memory, her hair was back in a ponytail. There was that mature aura again, "His feelings have changed, I'm pretty sure another girl has caught his attention, for a few years now even."

Gilbert didn't know why this news made him feel so disappointed. Was it the fear of Oz dating this girl? What if the blond would no longer pay attention to him? His mind too occupied with whatever couples do.

"I'm surprised though," it was Sharon's voice that kept his mind from wandering, "Because for a while, I was convinced his feelings had ebbed away, but I guess it's all related to what happened in our freshmen year."

After more then entire month of waiting and guessing, Gilbert was finally able to hear the truth. He was surprised that off all people, it was Sharon that told him. He had thought it would be Elliot or Alice, no longer being able to control their tongues. But now that he thought of it, it wasn't such an odd thing that Sharon was telling him what happened back then. Both Elliot and Alice were much closer to Oz then the young Rainsworth. Perhaps there had been a time where she as well had stood alongside the young West, a long time ago. _In another life perhaps?_ Gil was more then 100% sure that those two knew more then Sharon could ever know, Sharon could never know just how sensitive this subject truly was.

"Anton killed himself at the end of December. He wrote three letters, one for his parents, one for the school and one for Oz. I can tell you that whatever happened between Oz and Anton back then, is something Oz still blames himself for. In the letter addressed to the school, he blamed the bullies that had driven him to this point, he blamed the teachers for not stopping the bullying, but…" he hadn't noticed how her voice had changed all off sudden, even now the news made her feel upset, "…most off all, he blamed Oz." there was a hint of confusion written on her features, "For not giving him the only thing he wanted."

Gilbert said, "He was in love with Oz?"

Sharon said, "That's what everyone else thinks as well, he must have confessed on Oz's birthday and Oz must have turned him down. Oz must have broken down the moment he realized that Anton's suicide was related to him, he didn't show up at school for an entire month. It was a miracle he even made it that year."

"B-But…" Gilbert said, "I-it's not Oz's fault he killed himself, he…. He had every right to turn him down."

Sharon smiled fondly at him, "You really care about him," she said, the girl laughed when she saw his flustered expression, "It's good you care so much about him. I know what it's like to care for someone with a terrible past," she spoke of Break.

Had she found out what her adopted brother had to endure? " _Do you_ …-"

Sharon said, "Break doesn't talk about his past either. Reim told me you used to be neighbors… could you… I mean," she fumbled with her words, "Do you think… I mean, I-it should be Break, but I know he would never tell me… he thinks I'm too young, that I'd get upset… but I really want to help him, and I can't if… if…"

Gilbert felt a slow wave of guilt rush over him. This wasn't his story to tell. Break didn't want anyone to know about his past, the raven realized he was a hypocrite for he had just listened to Sharon talking about Oz's past, while he had not once asked Oz personally about what had happened in his past to shape him in the person he was now. He knew that this story was Oz's and Oz's alone. If the blond had wanted for him to hear it, he would have told him so himself.

Sharon didn't need to know about the many nights Gil's mother had to hold him while he was crying, not being able to understand why parents could do such horrible things to their son. How often had Gil cried for the small Kevin. Kevin who was older them him but didn't look like it. He remembered the many bruises covering his pale skins, how sick Kevin looked when someone tried to touch him.

Break' story was much too gruesome, he couldn't just tell her while eating lunch, as if they were talking about something as common as the weather.

"I-I…. don't know," he whispered softly, Sharon didn't believe him, that much he could tell. "I… I know they were abusive, but I was too young to understand. I never…. Never paid much attention to the bruises. M'sorry." He lowered his gaze.

The girl took a deep breath, "Well it's fine, I'm an idiot for asking anyway. It's fine."

He knew he had hurt her, but knew that Break would be very grateful for what he did. Gilbert did not know why he cared so much about that stupid clown, just that he wanted to protect him almost as much as he wanted to protect Oz.

He saw Reim heading into their direction and knew the brunet would agree.

* * *

With December came the first snow. Gilbert's group of friends had grown since then and before he knew it, he was one of the more popular people. Girls swarmed around him and asked him all sorts of ridiculous questions that made him all flustered and them giggle. Most of the times, Oz and the others just stared from a safe distance with huge grins on their face. But if things got too out of hand, the blond would rush in and safe him.

"Sorry, I need to borrow him for a while," no one dared to say no to Oz, everyone loved him too much for that. And if it wasn't Oz saving him, it was Break or Sharon. If anyone tried to protest, they'd just glare at them and then everyone would shut their mouth.

Their school had announced that the winter's ball would be on the 23rd of December. With every passing day, the date got closer and closer. Leaving Oz, Alice, Elliot and Leo with almost no free time since they had promised to perform.

If Oz wasn't in the school's dark room, he was at Leo's place practicing with the band. He had explained to Gil that under other circumstances he would have invited him over to watch, but right now Elliot was a ticking time-bomb, ready to explode if Oz didn't take his chores seriously.

The second week of December, Oz surprised the young raven by inviting him over to his house after school. Gilbert had casted a nervous glance at Elliot, scared that the Nightray would snap. But instead, he had a painful look in his eyes and kept quiet.

"His father found out we're going to perform at the school ball, he doesn't like Elliot playing music. Says it's a waste of time." Oz had explained to him when they were walking to his house.

As soon as school had been over, Gilbert had all but ran to get his bike. Oz and Alice had already been waiting for him at the school gates. Oz all dressed up in warm clothes and with a thick green scarf wrapped around his neck. While Alice still wore a thin leathered jacket and a short skirt, Gilbert was sure that the thin panties she wore weren't very warm. Yet not once did the brunette complain about the cold, in fact she looked rather comfortable.

At some point, Oz had stolen his bike and was now happily riding next to Gil and Alice at a walking speed.

"But Elliot loves music," Gil commented,

Alice said, "He's going to help me with my auditions, if that old man is going to make Elliot stop I'm going to kill him myself."

The way she said it made both Oz and Gil look at her with worry, not sure if she was joking or actually meant it, the look in her eyes made her appear rather scary after all.

"Well don't worry about it," the blond then quickly said, "Elliot has been ignoring his father's wishes for years when it comes to music, he just needs to spend some time with his family to show them he's also studying and they'll get off his case soon enough."

Gilbert nodded, feeling empathy for their hot-headed friend. "You said something about auditions, Alice… is there going to be a play at our school?" he then asked, turning his attention to the brunette. He had heard from the others that Alice was a great singer, she had joined Elliot's little band simply because Oz had asked her to. At first she had only performed with them when it suited her but as far as Gil knew, she appeared to have become a full-time member of the group and they rarely performed without her.

"Like hell I'm gonna perform at a school's play." Alice looked as thought she had eaten something absolutely horrible. "I want to enter Pandora's academy." _Pandora's academy of fine arts_. Everyone had heard of the school, it was one of the most expensive colleges of their country, almost every famous artist, were it writers, actors or painters, came from that school.

Gilbert had seen Alice's house when dropping Oz's off a few weeks ago, and knew she wasn't from a wealthy family. Her household was run by her two older siblings; her parents had passed away a long time ago. Yet… Latowidge was an expensive school as well.

"They're doing auditions in April, I want to get a scholarship." She explained. "I want to stop relying on Helen and Peter,"

"Your parents?" Gilbert asked and looked at Oz,

"They're paying for her education." The blond explained, "Since Latowidge is the only school that encourages talented people and stuff,"

"Never noticed how my other siblings don't go to the same school as me?" Alice asked then, "They go to a public high school, all scholarships of course."

"They must really like you then, to pay for your education." Gilbert commented.

Oz said, "Well she's been spending a lot of time at our house, they basically treat her as their daughter anyway."

Gilbert couldn't help but wonder what Oz's parents were like, he knew by now that they cared a lot about him. Oz's mother owned a three-stars restaurant called Sablier, and his father was a famous author, known for his bestselling thriller 'Through the rabbit's hole'. Yet they always made sure to spend as much time as possible with their son. He knew they loved hiking and were very enthusiast of Oz's hobbies. When his friend talked about his parents, he sometimes talked like he himself couldn't believe he had such wonderful parents.

Neither could Gil.

For some reason the image of the blond having two loving parents didn't sound right, he somehow had always imagined Oz with a single distant parent. It was such a horrid thought, one that he immediately pushed back to the back of his head. Oz deserved all the love he could get.

.

Both Oz and Alice lived nearby the center of the city, almost everything was within walking distance. The blond parked Gil's bike in his garage and let them enter his house through there. Since the garage was at the back of the house, they first had to enter through Peter's study and the dining room to get to the living room.

They made a quick stop in the kitchen so that Oz could give them both something to drink, he told Gil to drop his stuff wherever he liked

The raven followed Alice's example and carried all his belongings with him to upstairs where Oz's room was.

Oz's room… was nothing like he expected. He had imagined many pictures decorating the walls, closets filled with cameras and everything else he was good at. Instead, the boy's room was simple and minimalistic. Everything was neatly hidden away in a small walk in closet. His walls were painted in a light blue color, his desk was turned away from the large windows and only had his laptop and iPod on it. A black violin bag rested against the wooden desk, and beside that there was only a bed, a nightstand and a TV in his room. It wasn't really odd for Oz to have none of his pictures hanging in his room if you knew that most of them hung downstairs. But still… the room was awfully empty and the thought of it, just didn't feel right.

Not that his friends gave him much time to think about it, Alice started explaining to him what she had planned for her auditions, and before he knew it he was racing against them on the PlayStation with a car. Their conversation never stopped. He listened to them talk about everything and nothing at the same time.

Oz spoke of books he had just read and wanted to read, of projects he was working on and how he hated having to deal with annoying people that never were happy. Alice spoke of series and movies she had watched and how her older siblings sometimes forgot they weren't her real parents. He heard them make a bet on when Elliot was going to confess his undying love for Leo.

"How's Sharon, I haven't spoken to her lately?"

"E-eh, oh she's fine… her mother is sick again, though."

"Oh yeah, Sherly always had a terrible health… We should pay her a visit, don't you agree Alice?"

"Huh?"

And they'd move on to another subject. Time flew and before he knew it, he heard a woman shout from downstairs to ask if they would come down for dinner.

Gilbert was once again reminded that Oz looked nothing like his family when he joined them all downstairs to a delicious looking pasta with curry and scampi.

"So Gilbert, Oz told me you like to cook yourself." Helen commented, after he had awkwardly thanked her for dinner and complimented her food.

"A-ah yes… Since my father has to work until very late I-I usually do the cooking."

Peter said, "Oh my, I hope they'll survive without you then."

He noticed how easy it was to talk to them, they didn't treat him like a kid, neither did they make the conversation sound like an interview though it was obvious they were fishing for information. They also talked about themselves a lot and let Oz and Alice join. Although Gilbert did admit that at some point he had gotten off track and started focusing more on Helen, talking about all sorts of dishes he had made and how he was still very unsure of which spices he should use in certain dishes.

He listened to Helen's speech about coriander and only noticed after minutes of talking that everyone had gone quiet to listen to their conversation.

Both Helen and Gilbert had ended up very flustered when caught so passionately talking about food. Though Peter simply told her he loved it when she was like that. While Oz and Alice demanded for Gilbert to prepare some food for them.

Somehow he ended up with another invitation to the West household. He would have to prepare a meal for them, Helen even promised she'd come home early so that she could help him and give him some tips.

It was already past ten when Oz finally walked with him to the garage so that he could get his bike,

"So I hope you had fun," the blond joked while opening the garage gate.

"It was fun." He nodded,

"Just tell me whatever you need for your dish, mom will buy it."

"Oh, I couldn't possibly-"

"Geez Gil," Oz said, "You're going to cook for us, the least we could do is pay for the ingredients."

He wanted to protest, but the look in Oz's eyes said he wouldn't take any of it. So instead he gave up and rolled his eyes, "It doesn't matter what I want, does it?"

"No, not really." Oz offered him a cat like grin.

He realized this was the moment they would have to say goodbye, Gilbert still had to ride 30minutes on his bike. He could still talk to his friend tomorrow. Yet instead the raven sat on his saddle trying to keep the conversation going. The young West was shivering; he hadn't put on a jacket. His dark blue sweater although made out of a warm fabric, wasn't enough for the freezing weather.

He didn't know why he wanted to freeze time at that moment, he loved the way Oz looked so at ease even though he was cold. How easily the words rolled over his tongue, he was talking about something Echo did. He didn't really care what had happened, only that the blond looked absolutely beautiful when he talked of Echo.

"You really like her, huh?" Gil said, he couldn't help but smile when he saw how embarrassed Oz got the moment he realized he had been caught.

"W-well yes, a-as a friend, obviously."

"Friend huh?"

"Oh shut-it, Gil."

He laughed, and raised his hand to gently ruffle the shorter teen's hair, "Good luck." Gilbert smiled and finally pushed his pedal down. "See you tomorrow!" he said over his shoulder.

"Ah, see you tomorrow!" Oz shouted after him, watching him go away.

Gilbert drove faster then usual, somehow it felt like there was a heavy rock resting on his stomach. He didn't understand, he just had so much fun yet somehow he felt like Oz had punched him in the guts.

 _But that made no sense_.

When he finally arrived home it was close to midnight.

His father sat in the kitchen, the entire table filled with papers off all sorts. "It's late," Auguste Raven said without looking up,

"I know," Gilbert sighed, "I lost track of time, I'm sorry."

"Why do you even have a phone if you're not using it for it's intended purpose?" the man asked, the younger Raven already saw where this was heading to. His mind went numb, and before he knew it he had already turned around and headed straight towards the stairs.

"Gilbert, I'm talking to you."

 _No, not now. He felt horrible for some reason, he didn't need another lecture._

"Gilbert!"

He stopped halfway on the stairs,

"What's gotten into you? I'm talking to you, show me some respect and listen."

Somewhere in the background, he heard a door open. Vincent must have heard the noise and came to check, it was after all very unusual for their father to raise his voice towards Gil.

Auguste sighed then, he scratched the back of his head. "Look son, if something happened you can always come and talk to me… just, please send me a text if you're staying longer. I was worried."

He took a deep breath, "I know… I'm sorry."

"Do you wanna talk about what's bothering you?"

"No, I'm fine." He lied.

Vincent whispered, "Liar,"

And the raven cast him a nasty look, one that appeared to be convincing enough because even Vincent looked surprised. Gilbert went up the stairs and headed straight towards his room. Only then did he allow himself to cry.

 _How odd…_ he hadn't cried in such a long time. And yet he somehow couldn't stop the tears from falling. He felt awful, something was bothering him yet he couldn't put a name on it. Gilbert couldn't feel more pathetic.

* * *

Friday morning, Oz smile was the first thing he saw when he entered the school building. The blond had been talking to Echo, and the moment he saw his raven haired friend, his whole face had lit up. The blond gestured for him to join them. Which he did without a second thought.

"I've got a present for you!" his friend said the moment he was in hearing distance, already holding out said present. "It's the book I told you about yesterday, plus an invitation to café Harmonica, Elliot just told us we're performing tonight. I'm allowed to invite two people, guess who made it in my top two." He had a proud grin on his face.

Gilbert took both items, he then glanced at Echo who held up her invitation as well. Knowing that was what he was looking for.

"We're on at nine, it might get late, if you want you can stay over at my place. Echo is staying over at Alice's so you don't have to worry about sleeping on the couch." He made a v sing with his left hand. To which Gilbert rolled his eyes,

"Sure, I'll ask my dad if I can come…. I'm going to have to pick up some stuff from home first, though."

"Yeah sure, no problem!" Oz nodded, the first bell rang, telling them it was time to head to their classes. "Oh gotta go, my class is at the end of the universe, we'll talk during lunch, meet me in _my_ class!" he said and then ran off.

"You live nearby pizzeria Antonio, right?" Echo asked,

"A-ah yes,"

"Want to take the bus together?" she offered, she looked bored and for a sec Gil thought she really didn't want to go, he agreed to meet her at six at the bus stop, it was when he was already heading to class and cast a quick look over his shoulder that he saw how happy she was. Echo was smiling shyly at the ticket Oz had given her.

And it crossed Gil's mind then that this would be the perfect moment for Oz to confess, all he had to do was beg Elliot to make them perform a love song and then he could tell Echo it was meant for her. The thought sounded cheesy, _but still_ … he smiled, rather proud of Oz's tactics to win his crush's heart. _Although_ it was quite obvious that the West had already won over her heart.

All he could do was root for him and hope for the best, that's after all the job of a best friend.


	10. Gil: I've got my mind set on you

**This chapter was written very late at night, I have classes tomorrow... so sorry if it's a bit off ^^, please tell me if you find any spelling errors or sentences that don't sound right.**

 **I do not own Pandora Hearts.**

* * *

"Oh so you're going to one of Elliot's shows?" Sharon asked.

Once again they were seated at their usual spot, by now everyone in the school knew that this was their usual spot. Both Break and Reim had halted their conversation the moment they heard Sharon and Gil talk about his plans for that evening. "Huh, I really want to go too. It's been a while after all since I've last heard them perform." The young girl sighed.

"We could go," Reim agreed, "How much does a ticket cost?"

Gilbert fumbled with the ticket he had received that morning. The band members were each allowed to invite one person over, both Elliot and Leo didn't have anyone they wanted to invite so they had given their tickets to Alice and Oz. Gilbert had been lucky enough to be chosen by Oz. He didn't know who Alice was going to pick, though.

"It says nine dollars." He said.

"We should go, Break!" Sharon said, excited by the thought of hearing her friends perform once again. It must have really been a while judging by her reaction.

"Eh, why should I go?" Break complained, a scowl on his face. In a way, he reminded Gil of an old grumpy man who didn't want to be seen with a bunch of brats.

"Because I really want to go," Sharon offered him one of her famous eerie smiles, one that shut the albino up right away. He gulped and nodded.

"Yey!" the girl giggled, she clapped her hands together. For a second, you'd almost forget she had just gotten her way by threatening someone. _Almost_. Even Gil had felt a shiver run down his spine the moment the aura around her changed. It was Reim's calm smile that calmed him down a bit. The brunette was holding his phone to show him something. "You've never seen them perform, right?" He asked while handing Gil his mobile. "They have a YouTube channel, so I thought you might be interested." He tapped the touchscreen and the video started playing.

Gilbert saw a much younger, Elliot and Leo putting everything ready on stage. They got quickly followed by Alice and Oz who smiled at some people in the crowd. They all looked so much younger, Elliot and Leo were about the same height and Alice appeared to be taller then Oz.

"How old were they?" he found himself asking,

"I think Elliot had just turned 13, I couldn't find a movie with all four of them. Sorry,"

Gilbert said confused, "How so? I thought they always performed together."

"Well yes, but Alice wasn't an official part of the band for a long time, and Oz has a rather busy life." Reim explained,

"Plus Elliot started to have a lot of fights with his family once he entered high school…" the girl tapped the phone so that the video would pause. Oz and the others had just put everything ready and were about to start before Sharon paused them. "I think this is actually going to be the first time in a long time that they'll be performing together again."

"But this is their YouTube channel… so…" Gilbert looked at the name, eyes furrowed. "…What do they usually post on it then?"

"Mostly it's Alice and Elliot making a duet together, she sings he accompanies her with the piano."

He knew there was so much more behind it. But when he looked at both Sharon and Reim's faces he knew that they were telling him the truth of what they knew. Though one quick look at Break told him enough, _Break knew more_.

"Alright, ready?" Reim then asked, realizing they were getting off topic. They had a free period due to one of their teachers being sick, soon the bell would ring to tell them lunch-break had started. Gil had promised to meet up with Oz then, time was running out. He nodded and Reim started the video once again.

He watched Oz sit on a tall wooden chair both he and Leo held an acoustic guitar, Elliot stood behind a keyboard and pressed the first few notes of the song they were going to play. While Alice just stood behind the microphone, her hair hung loose, she wore a simple white dress and stood with bare feet on the stage.

The moment the song had started she started moving, slowly moving her body along the melody of the song. She danced beautifully and her movements were in sync with the song. Then she leaned forward and sang,

" _Just like a rainbow bright and warm after a hazy summer storm  
Flowers blooming fresh with drops of dew…"_

Gilbert was mesmerized by her voice, it sounded nothing like how she usually talked. True, Alice was three years younger in the video, but still. He was more then eager to hear more.

And then Oz sang, his voice hadn't yet reached puberty and sounded a lot more feminine then it did now.

" _Watching you stare into the sky in the crimson sunlight_

 _That's when I fell in love with you."_

He sang and then cast a quick glance towards Alice, the girl seemed totally different then how she usually acted. Every move she made was elegant. She let herself be carried away by the music and somehow managed to do the same with the audience.

" _Each moment in a picture frame_

 _I'm holding on no single shot will ever fade."_

Gilbert noticed the 3rd microphone then, since it was part of Elliot's keyboard he had barely noticed it.

" _The movie of this love every part deep within my heart."_ Alice sang.

And nothing could have prepared him for this, both Alice and Oz sang the chorus. Their voices fit perfectly together, but what made the song sound even more beautiful was Elliot's back-up.

" _You are the spark my light in the dark_

 _Brilliant and bold through the night_

 _Bright as the sun no matter what comes_

 _We can be stars if we shine."_

He knew that Elliot Nightray was a wonder child when it came to music. Gilbert had never bothered to ask how many instruments he could play but he knew that it was a lot. Never would he have expected for Elliot to be able to sing as well.

Like any background singer, Elliot was back up. It wasn't his job to draw attention, in fact, Elliot made sure that both Alice and Oz stood out more thanks to him.

Gil realized they had only been thirteen years old when this video had been made, yet he already sounded so professional. He admitted that their band was great, that both Oz and Alice were talented singers… but they weren't anything like Elliot.

The bell rung and he sat up straight as if stung by a wasp. "Oh damn! Oz!" he gasped and got up, he quickly grabbed all off his belongings and jumped off the stairs. "Thanks, I've gotta go now!"

"Alright, tell Oz we'll be at his performance tonight!" Sharon shouted after him.

Gilbert waved at them and then started running towards the dark room. Oz somehow always got there faster then him, he knew that his friend needed all the time he could get when in there. Developing pictures took time and one hour wasn't enough. So the young West hated waiting.

And true enough, Oz had already arrived. It wasn't the first time that Gilbert noticed that somehow, the blond was never alone. If he wasn't being shadowed by Alice, then it was someone else enjoying his company. This time it was Aida Vesalius, Oz had left the door of the classroom open, a sign for anyone that wanted to come in that they could. He hadn't started yet. The curtains were still open.

Oz had placed his schoolbag on the ground and gotten his laptop out of it, said device was already open so that Oz could show Aida some pictures he had taken.

"I like that one, can you edit it so that colors look a bit warmer?" she asked, "They'd go well with Zwei's autumn column."

The blond nodded and made a quick note on his computer, he then proceeded to show her other pictures he had taken. Gilbert quietly walked up to them so that he could see them as well. Both looked up at the same time, "Ah Gil, sorry it won't take long." Oz greeted him with a kind smile,

"O-Oh no, it's fine." He stuttered,

Aida offered him an apologetic look.

 _They look alike_ … he thought. _Almost like siblings_.

-" _Brother… what's the Abyss?_ "-

Images flashed in front of the raven's eyes. He blinked rapidly, trying to make sense of what he was seeing. Suddenly he was walking outside, following two blond haired kids. The memory disappeared as soon as it came.

He felt dizzy…

"Gil?"

Someone was shouting his name. He knew that voice, _he missed that voice_.

 _Ten years…_

"Gil? Are you alright?"

He sounded scared,

There was a hand reaching out for him.

 _He's waking up._

"Gil, Gi…. GIL!"

 _I'm Raven_ -

-" _You….ng master-_ "

He blinked and suddenly he was back in a classroom, Oz's face only a few inches away from him. The blond had placed his hands on both his shoulders. Gilbert saw how his friend's eyes slowly widened.

Behind him stood Aida, who was gazing at him with worry. She had clasped both hands before her mouth, he realized he must have been really out of it for her to worry so much. When exactly had Oz even gotten so close?

Oz opened his mouth, he blinked a few times and said, "Young master?"

...eh?

Eh.

 _EH-_

Gilbert felt his face heating up the moment those words had left Oz's mouth. Had he really just said that out loud? No, no way. There was no way he had just called Oz young master. In front of Aida even. The raven could just die out of humiliation. "Wh-what, No, no I-I didn't I just-"

A sly grin appeared on the Oz's face, one that said it all; there was no way he could talk himself out of this.

"I didn't know you thought that highly of me, well I feel like I mustn't let you down. Alright, Gilbert!" he laughed and took a step back, that cocky grin never leaving his face.

"From now on, you can be my valet!" he laughed,

Even Aida had to hide her smile behind her hands.

"No-no, it wasn't like that at all!" the raven tried to protest but it was all in vain.

For a while now, Gilbert had been convinced that Aida was a kind girl. He realized at that very moment how wrong he was. She and Oz kept teasing him until it was time for her to leave. Then they finally dropped the subject.

Oz simply sat down and started working on his laptop, it was too late to start developing pictures now anyway. He had asked for Gilbert to close the door so that students knew he no longer wanted to be interfered. The raven put on the old radio that stood on one of the many unused desks.

The thing made a lot of noise and it took him a good few minutes before he found a good radio station. He realized the volume was on maximum the moment he heard a female voice say, "Thanks for calling Emily, and for all the listeners that think this cold weather could use something to warm up your day; here is George Harrison with I've got my mind set on you!"

The music started playing and Gilbert knew he wasn't the only one surprised by how loud the music was. He had heard the surprised sound leaving Oz's mouth, but knew that one embarrassing sound was nothing compared to him actually tripping over his own feet and landing hard on his bottom.

Which of course led to Oz once again not being able to hold his laughter. The blond got up and turned to volume down before he helped the raven with getting up.

" _It's gonna take time_

 _A whole lot of precious time…"_

"Oh Gil," Oz sighed once he had caught his breath, wiping away a tear. He shook his head in amusement and sat down again to continue working on his projects.

Gilbert sat awkwardly next to him, his face completely red. He knew he had just provided the blond with enough teasing material for a long time.

He thought the blond would torment him even more, but he was saved by the pressure of Oz having to finish too many things at the same time.

" _I got my mind set on you_

 _I got my mind set on you."_

Oz's eyes never left his screen as he quietly sang along with the music. Sometimes Gilbert found himself wondering if Oz ever ate when he was so occupied with work. He rarely saw his friend eat during lunch, now that he thought of it. Usually Oz was too focused on editing pictures. Did he eat before he started? Or did he perhaps eat after?

Gilbert got his thermos bottle out of his bag. That morning he had felt a wave of nostalgia rush over him when he found an unopened bag of Twinings Vanilla tea. His mother's favorite.

The raven had prepared three thermos bottles; his father hadn't even batted an eye. Gilbert's mom used to prepare thermos bottles with tea for them each morning. So Gil's father had grabbed some toast and the thermos, he had ruffled his son's hair and then rushed off to work.

Gilbert now poured some tea in the tiny cup and offered it to his friend. He couldn't help but smile fondly when he saw Oz slowly turning his head. His hands never left his laptop. And for a second his gaze remained frozen on the screen, before he slowly broke eye contact with it.

Oz gazed at the cup the raven was holding out to him, a smile found its way on the blond's face and he took the cup.

"Thank you," he said.

And when he drank from it, he seemed to relax a bit. "I've never tasted this before, what is it?"

"My mom's favorite," he said without a second thought, he realized a moment too late that he had said something that could make everything awkward. "Ah- it's Vanilla… uh, Twinings."

"Your mom has good taste," Oz said, a kind smile on his face. One that said a thousand words to Gilbert. _It's alright._ And for a second, it looked like the blond knew what it was like to lose a mother. And Gilbert believed him.

Gilbert refilled the cup when it got empty. At some point Oz joked that he was really treating him like a young master. But he still drank from it. The raven didn't even notice when exactly Oz had closed his laptop and instead talked to him about everything and nothing at the same time. It was great. Gilbert loved when his friend started talking and it seemed like their conversation wasn't going to end. He could listen for hours to Oz's soft and gentle voice.

He loved it when Oz talked about stories he was passionate about, because then his eyes would fill with joy and he'd talk as much with his body as with his mouth. He loved it when Oz talked about his friends, because then he'd have this far away look as he thought of how much he loved each one of them. He loved it when Oz talked about things he knew, because then he'd get all serious and curious, like he couldn't wait to read more about the subject.

He just loved listening to Oz so much, Gilbert knew he could never ever get tired of Oz's voice. So he listened, and listened… and most of all; he loved Oz's smile when he saw that Gilbert was truly listening to him.

* * *

As promised, he waited for Echo at the bus stop. It was already dark when he left the house. Snow fell from the sky and Gil was shivering from head to toe when the girl showed up. He was slightly surprised when he saw her. For once she had done something different with her hair, it was curly and her longer bangs had been put together into a small bun. She even wore a bit of make-up to make her eyes stand out more.

Gilbert didn't know why he felt a stone sink into the bottom off his stomach. He had to force a smile, "You look pretty." He told her.

The hint of a blush appeared on Echo's face. It was odd to see her lose her cool, even if it was for just a second. She Awkwardly twirled a strand of hair between her fingers, "Isn't it too much?" she asked, "The dress as well… I feel like I've overdone it." She confessed then.

 _Yeah…_ He shook his head, "I'm sure Oz will think you're cute… though I'm also sure he always thinks of you as cute." He gently patted her on her head, scared that he might ruin her hair.

"Who said I'm doing this for Oz?" she protested, a scowl appeared on her face. The truth was obvious though. So Gilbert laughed and they both waited for the bus in silence. Echo was pleased.

It took them only ten minutes to get to the café once the bus arrived. Some people were standing outside, holding a pint while others smoked their cigarettes. They nodded at them as a way of greeting. It was obvious Echo didn't have much experience when it came to crowded places. She'd rather watch from a safe distance and not be the center of attention. Which was a failure. She had dressed up nicely for tonight, not too much to stand out, but still enough to let others know she was beautiful.

Gil was no fool.

He as well as everyone else around Echo and Oz knew how they looked at each other when they thought the other wasn't looking. He knew that the girl was only ever truly herself when she was around the blond, as he knew that Echo was the only person that could make Oz a stuttering mess.

He knew that Oz must have planned something. He also knew that Echo was hoping for just that.

When it was finally Elliot and the others their time to perform, they had already found a place nearby the stage. He knew that Echo held her breath when Oz smiled at her from his seat. She probably didn't even notice Alice greeting her as well.

Elliot rolled his eyes and mumbled something under his breath. Leo laughed and they started. Just like that. As if it was the most normal thing to do.

Gilbert was once again reminded just how talented the people were around him. The café had this calm and nostalgic atmosphere, and his friends played like that. The first song they sang was slow. Oz's voice was calm and soothing while Alice's carried you away to foreign countries overseas. She danced slowly along the music.

The song they sang was a famous one, one that everyone could sing along with.

They had made a great start.

And when the second song had started, everyone from outside had already come back inside. The small place was filled with people enjoying their performance, and surely enough it attracted more people from outside.

Outside it was freezing, inside it was warm. There were hot drinks and songs to sing along with. It didn't take long before Echo was almost pressed against him. Echo never sang along; he wouldn't have expected her to anyway. Instead her eyes remained glued on the beautiful blond guitarist on stage.

Alice started to clap in her hands, a beat she wanted the audience to follow. This song was slightly faster, while it was also a famous one, the tempo had been changed. Making sure they would never ruin the gentle atmosphere hanging around the café.

" _So this is what you meant… when you said that you were spend…_  
 _And now it's time to build from the bottom of the pit  
Right to the top  
Don't hold back…"_

He waited for Alice to join in, waited for Elliot's voice to back them up when they hit the chorus. He loved how easily they controlled the audience. People swayed along with Alice's movements. They closed their eyes as they watched a small group of teenagers lose themselves in the music they were making.

"Oz is different." Echo said.

She was right. It was obvious Alice loved singing, as it was obvious for anyone else that both Leo and Elliot loved to play their instruments. But it was true that Oz sort of faded out between them. Alice was the lead singer, she controlled the stage. And while it was a background singer's job to make the lead singers their voices stronger… he stood out more then Oz. It almost seemed as if Oz was the background singer, a decoy, so that outsiders wouldn't pay too much attention to Elliot.

"He's down to earth." Echo concluded.

"He keeps everyone from flying away." He agreed.

Would the audience know if Oz stopped playing his guitar? Would they notice if he no longer finished the song with Alice?

Could Elliot just take over and no one would bat an eye?

They sang until 10pm, and then Alice told the audience that their time was up. The other band would get on in ten minutes. She hadn't even finished her sentence before the entire room demanded more. The girl had cast a curious look at the barman, who simply shrugged and gave gave them a thumbs-up. Making the truth a bit different; they should have stopped at 10pm. But instead stopped when it was almost midnight and the band that had to come after them had taken a seat in the café as well, knowing they might not play that night. Gilbert pitied them, but couldn't be more then happy when he saw how happy Alice was when she could keep on singing. She lost herself in the music.

She didn't look like herself.

Alice looked like she was truly enjoying herself. Nothing could ruin her mood then. Even when they were done and had cleaned up, she stayed in the crowd and listened to people complimenting her. Elliot and Leo joined Gil's side and subtly told him to leave with them so that Oz and Echo could have some alone time.

He gazed at the two from a safe distance. While Elliot and Leo tried to give them some privacy, it was obvious the two were keeping an eye on them as well. At some point they didn't even bother to be subtle anymore and just gazed openly at the two.

"Is he going to do it?" Leo at one pointed asked, the three of them leaning against a wall while holding their drinks. Oz had already moved much closer to her, his face only a mere inch away from her as he listened to her talk. And then the three friends held their breath as he saw him lean closer to her.

"That sly bastard," Elliot grinned and took a sip from his pint.

Only Oz didn't kiss her, something caught his attention and he leaned back in his seat. Echo appeared slightly disappointed but easily covered it up.

"What just happened?" Elliot asked confused,

Leo took his time by answering, he tied his hair together in a messy bun and adjusted his glasses. "I don't know…" he then admitted. No jokes, no making fun of Elliot not being to understand something. Even Gilbert didn't know what exactly just went wrong.

Oz wasn't a tease.

This wasn't like him at all…

Alice interrupted the two a bit later, telling them she wanted to go home. Elliot and the others joined their side as well and they left the café together. Him and Leo headed towards the Nightray house. While, Alice, Oz, Gil and Echo waited for their bus to come. Gilbert felt more comfortable knowing that Echo was going to stay with them rather then walking alone at night. Alice stuck by Gil's side, so that their friends could talk a bit more. The brunette leaned closer to the raven, and he did the same without even thinking twice about it.

"What do you think happened?" Alice asked.

"Perhaps Echo didn't want to?"

To which Alice frowned, she shook her head. No that was not it… if even Alice noticed something wasn't right, then something obviously didn't go as planned.

* * *

Later that night, when the two teens lay side by side in Oz's bed did the blond answer his question. "I guess… I just didn't want to." There's something odd about conversations after midnight. Gilbert had often thought so. People's walls would slowly crumble down, revealing broken castle walls and ravished rooms.

Oz laughed softly to himself, he heard the sound of rustling when the blond turned on his side so that he could face him the dark. "It's stupid really… I know it was the right moment… but I froze… and I just couldn't do it anymore."

"Have you… ever dated someone before?" he asked softly.

There fell a long silence, Gilbert at some pointed even pondered if his friend had fallen asleep, but the blond still gave him his answer. "…No." he admitted shyly.

"Perhaps that's the source of your problem."

To which the blond snorted in amusement, "Yes, I'm sure it's because of that."

"It could be," the raven said, "It's fine, you'll get another chance."

Another silence, Oz sighed and placed his hand between their heads. Gilbert slowly brought his hand closer and raised it so that he could draw small circles in the palm of Oz's hand.

He heard the blond breathe out, he smiled softly. "Say Gil…"

"Hm?" Gilbert realized that at moment, Oz could have asked him anything.

So when the blond said, "Tell me about your mother,"

He didn't even hesitate, "She loved Twinings tea, her favorite was vanilla." To which the blond softly hummed, "She wanted to become a writer and really looked up to your father. If she knew I met him and that he likes taking pictures funny pictures of his son she'd be envious." To which Oz breathed out a laugh, "She often got lost in her own world, and when she came back she had to write everything down. She had so many journals written with story ideas. But she never once tried to publish one… I think she was scared. My mother hated rejection more then anything."

Oz hummed, a sign for him to go on. He felt how the blond relaxed, how he was gradually dozing off.

"She always put bath-towels in the kitchen, in case it rained we could dry ourselves off in the hallway. My mother believed in angels…"

Silence… and then Oz breathed in before he said, "I think you've told me that before," he smiled.

"It's one of the most memorable things she's ever told me… I guess, since she brought it up at all times. She believed that angels were loyal, selfless, strong, kind, pure and innocent." It was remarkable that he still remembered the list, when he used to be younger it seemed to be endless. He remembered thinking that it must be hard to be an angel. Though Gilbert was sure, that the person lying next to him must be one.

Gilbert was met with a Déjà-vu feeling when Oz suddenly pulled his hand away. He sounded different all off sudden, "Your mother sounds like a very creative person,"

"….S-she was, yeah."

Oz sighed, he sounded so tired all off sudden. He then turned his back to the raven and wished him a goodnight.

Leaving Gilbert with nothing but questions. It was then that he also remembered that he hadn't seen Sharon and the others that night. Had something come up? He wondered.

People were hiding things from.

He couldn't help but feel slightly sad as he gazed at Oz's back. He knew that on Monday he could just ask them if something had come up. But he couldn't ask Oz why he suddenly pulled back. He had closed the gates and the walls around him appeared to be stronger then ever.

Oh Oz... if only he knew how much Gilbert wished to take all off his pain away. He'd do anything to see a genuine smile on his face.

He sighed and slowly drifted to sleep. Hoping that tomorrow would be better.


	11. Gil: Of Raven's in Victorian houses

**I do not own Pandora Hearts.**  
 **Please leave a review! ^^**

* * *

- _Gilbert dreamt_ of Victorian houses. He dreamt of walking through long corridors, surrounded by people who's whispers filled the room. _Raven_ they called him.

He dreamt of walking into Oz's shadow, always three steps behind him. And as he did so, he saw his master interacting with others. Gilbert saw how easily Oz mingled with the crowd, how beautiful he was when he smiled and how grown-up he appeared when discussing politics.

 _At least_ … Gilbert assumed they were talking politics.

For some reason he knew that he was meant to walk in Oz's shadows. He knew that it was Oz's job to always walk in the light, all eyes should always be on him. And even though he feared that one day Oz would leave him. Gil did not reach out to him. He did not try to stop Oz.

" _I wanted to believe in your forever_."

He knew he was dreaming. Oz had never smiled so brightly at him. He had never gotten so close to him. Close enough, so that all Gilbert had to do was lean a bit closer to close the gap between their mouths. He knew he was dreaming because Oz was sitting on the staircases of a big mansion. Inside a party was going on, but they sat outside, enjoying each other's company while sharing a bottle of wine.

Oz leaned back on the palm of his hands while they both gazed up to the stars. Gilbert had never seen a sky so beautiful. With barely no streetlights, they could see the sky as it was meant to be.

This wasn't a memory either. Gilbert realized. Not even the Gilbert and Oz from another story interacted with each other like this. Something in the back of his head told him that the other him had dreamt of this too. He as well had wished for a moment like this. A moment of peace… Of Oz looking at him with those beautiful emerald eyes. Eyes that rarely missed anything. He had often seen them scanning an area or going over someone. Gilbert had wished that Oz would look at him like that sometime. As if he was some puzzle that needed to be solved.

But to Oz, Raven was no puzzle. He knew him better then he knew himself. And yet at that very moment… Oz looked at him with a focused look. As if this was the first time he saw Gil. The hint of a smile on his lips, and he said something. Gil didn't even care what it was that he said. All he knew was that he was growing impatient. _I'm nothing like her_ \- _I'm not letting you overthink-_ Who was she? How could Oz even start overthinking or doubt himself in this situation? Everything went so well. The atmosphere was just right and he had never seen the blond so relaxed.

He placed his hand on Oz's cheek, he knew that they must be freezing. Of course they would. They had been outside for quite some time. But Oz didn't flinch away. Instead he placed his hand over Gil's and slightly turned his head so that he could plant a kiss in the palm of his hand. His lips should be frozen, yet the raven felt no cold. Instead he felt warm and lightheaded.

He didn't think when he finally closed the gap between their mouths. The only thing that went through his mind when he felt Oz slowly gasp for air was, _"Finally… Finally…_ "

Gilbert moved closer. Until there was barely any space between them left. He felt Oz's hands go through his hair while he placed both his hands on the blond's side. The kiss tasted like alcohol. Gil loved how easily Oz followed his lead. The way the boy gasped softly for air between their kisses.

 _Gilbert knew he was dreaming_.

And when he woke up, those past few days started to make a lot of sense to him. Realization came hard, leaving him with nothing but a headache and a problem he did not know how to solve. It was morning. Oz's side of the bed was already empty. Which was for the better. How could he even face his friend after what he dreamt? Gilbert sighed. He allowed himself a little time to panic and think things over before he forced himself to head downstairs. It was already ten in the morning.

The TV was on in the living room, though no one was watching. Oz could be found in the kitchen along with his father. Peter was preparing breakfast while talking to his son. The man made a lot of gestures and almost dropped the pan two times. When Oz noticed Gil's presence, he turned around to face him and offered him a kind smile. One that made Gil's stomach jump.

"Ah Gil, sorry."

"F-for what?"

"For not staying," Oz said, "I went downstairs to drink something and wanted to come back, but as you can see…" he gestured at his father, "Dad is a dangerous cook so I wanted to keep an eye out."

Peter acted as if he was offended, "I'll have you know that I'm a much better cook then you. Last time you cooked we almost had to go to the hospital." He said.

Oz looked slightly embarrassed while trying to laugh it off. Alice had already warned the raven that he should never let Oz cook alone. And the more stories he heard of Oz's cooking skills, the more he feared the day that Oz would cook for him. When Peter tried throwing the pancake in the air but failed miserably, Gilbert offered to take care of breakfast.

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly ask my guest to cook for us," the man said while handing him the cooking pan. He ruffled Oz's hair when he walked past him and then left. Oz watched his father go, before he turned back around again. A soft smile on his lips.

One that made Gil's heart miss a beat. He tried hiding his blush by focusing on his new task. He was lucky Oz was distracted. Still it didn't help when he heard the blond walking closer. Oz leaned against the counter, his arms crossed.

"Something troubling you?" Oz asked,

"A-ah no… J-just a bad dream, that's all."

He had excepted for Oz to make a joke, but instead he visibly paled. Oz hummed in agreement while scratching the back of his neck, "Yeah…" he smiled, "Me too." He then smiled, "I dreamt of kissing a toad and then turning into one myself,"

Gilbert laughed, "That sounds way worse then mine,"

Oz laughed as well, "Yeah? What was yours about then?"

 _You-_ Gilbert met Oz's gaze, _oh damn-_ he sighed. The kitchen only had a small window, but it was enough to illuminate Oz's face. His soft features, round eyes that seemed to lit up whenever he smiled… everything about the boy was relaxed and at ease. He wore a red shirt with the Coca-Cola brand on and a black jogging, his hair was still messy and Gil loved how domestic he looked. He felt his heart ache, wishing that one day he could wake up next to Oz in their own apartment.

When he didn't respond, Oz's smile slipped off his face, he blinked and asked, "What's wrong?"

"I dreamt of Break confessing his undying love for me." Gilbert then deadpanned. "I think I might have a trauma now." The image of Break saying 'I love you' with a pleading look and a background of pink flowers popped in his head, it made the raven shudder.

To which Oz laughed, "Actually, I think you win, yours sounds way worse then mine."

Gilbert caught himself staring and quickly returned his gaze back to the food he was making. He tried to act as normal as possible while he listened to Oz talk. If he misheard something, he blamed it on the pancakes he was preparing, they obviously needed all off his attention. It certainly wasn't everything about Oz being distracting.

Had Oz always talked this much? While the thought of Oz being the one that talks, and Gil being the one who listened sounded nothing but familiar. He still caught himself pondering if this was always the case.

He knew that when Alice was around, it was mostly the girl that talked. But that's just Alice. With Echo, it was Oz that talked mostly and eventually Echo followed. Oz had this special gift. He made everyone feel comfortable around him after five minutes of talking to him.

 _A distant memory_ of a younger Oz sitting in a chair flashed in front of his eyes. The young boy was reading-… _no studying_. The book he was holding had a long title with at least two difficult words in it.

 _No matter what… I will be beside you-_

"Yey, breakfast is ready!" Oz shouted when they had a small pile of pancakes, enough to feed three people.

For the rest twenty minutes, Gilbert had to listen to Peter complimenting him. "You're a great cook!"

"A-ah it's really nothing… I-it's just pancakes."

"Just pancakes? These pancakes are amazing!"

Oz rolled his eyes, amused by his father's high praise. Though he seemed even more amused to see Gilbert getting all flustered. Gil desperately tried to change the subjects, but Peter would have none of it. He refused to stop praising him, unless the raven accepted he truly was a remarkable cook.

"Do you have a job right now, kid?" Peter asked after he finished.

Gilbert shook his head. Not so long ago, he still had a job at a small drugstore. He had to give up said job because his father didn't like it when Vincent was alone at home for too long. Even though Vincent was already seventeen, and had proved to Gil many times that he could take care of himself. His father would hear none of it.

"I'm sure Helen could use some help in her kitchen, if you're ever interested give us a call, won't you?"

"Huh, how come Gil get's offered a job and I don't?" Oz then asked, he tried to act as if he was hurt by hearing this but the look on his face begged to differ. The young West actually appeared to be rather proud of Gilbert.

"Because son, you're terrible in the kitchen." Peter deadpanned. "If you weren't my child, I would have probably assumed you were some snobby brat that never set foot in a kitchen-"

To which Gilbert snorted, the words " _You have no idea,"_ rested on the tip of his tongue. He was smart enough not to speak them out loud. Oz glared at him from the corner of his eyes, there was this familiar look in his eyes. One that said Gil was going to regret making fun of him.

\- " _Miss Kate is going to scold us."-_

"Besides," Peter's voice cut through the memory, he pointed his fork at his son, "You've already got a job at Sir Vesalius's office, you shouldn't complain."

"I got that job after weeks of searching. While I could have just as easily started at mom's restaurant."

"Oh certainly, you could have become the dishes guy!" Peter agreed,

Gilbert noticed the not so pleased look on Oz's face. As if the mere thought of cleaning the dishes upset him.

"Didn't you break your mom's favorite mug a few days ago?"

"Ugh! I get it! I'm terrible at cleaning up." Oz groaned while getting a hand through his hair.

Gilbert smiled softly while he listened to his friend bickering with his father. He loved that Peter revealed all sorts of hidden details about Oz. While it really should come as no surprise that Oz was terrible at cleaning, Gil still loved to hear things. Thus he remained quiet and let the two continue their conversation. So that by the time they were finished, Peter had also brought up that the only reason why Oz's room so bare was; was because he was terrible at keeping it clean.

In the end, Oz got the final word, "Well then," he said with a very evil grin, "If I'm so terrible at cleaning up, I'm sure you wouldn't mind cleaning up the table and the dishes."

"A-ah, I didn't mean it like that-"

Oz ignored his father begging for forgiveness and stood up, "C'mon Gil, let's go for a walk!"

 _Pure Evil._ Gil realized for the first time, that he should be grateful Oz and Break didn't spend that much time together.

He offered Peter an apologetic look. The man simply rolled his eyes in amusement and waved him off, "It's fine, It's better this way. He's really terrible at cleaning." S

"Huh, what was that?" Oz asked annoyed,

"Do you have money on you?"

"I'm not going to buy anything,"

"Nonsense," Peter got up, he grabbed his wallet out of his pocket and handed his son some money. "Go shopping, that way I can focus on my work for a bit." He ruffled Oz's hair.

"You're kicking me out of the house?"

"As a matter of fact I am." Peter joked.

"Fine, Gil and I are gonna buy lots of alcohol and get wasted then!"

To which Peter laughed and shrugged, "Have fun,"

* * *

Alice already had her hand on the doorknob when Oz opened the door, she lost her balance and fell with a loud scream on Oz. Who stumbled back and dragged Gil with him on the floor.

"What the hell you stupid rabbit!" Gilbert shouted while he rubbed the back of his head.

"I heard a scream, what's going on?" Peter asked while he ran into the hallway. He stopped though once he saw the three teenagers lying on the ground, both Alice and Oz were using Gilbert as their pillow.

"Huh like this is my fault!" Alice argued, "How should I know you were opening the door at the same time as me?"

"You could have knocked, like normal people!"

"Knock? I haven't knocked on this door since I was five!"

Peter rolled his eyes and muttered something about youth while he went back into the living room. Oz in the meantime started laughing because of the odd situation they had just gotten themselves into. He was stuck between the two fighting people and it didn't look like he was gonna get out soon.

Both Gil and Alice were so caught up in arguing, they barely noticed their other friend.

"-Besides, weren't you supposed to hang out with Echo?"

"I just dropped her off at the bus stop-"

"I can't breathe-"

"Not now Oz! Besides-"

Oh bother. The blond laughed while he let the two bicker. And perhaps Gilbert should have gotten up... but Oz didn't seem to mind how close they were. So he remained on the ground for just a little bit longer.

"-seaweed brain!"

"It's not seaweed you stupid rabbit!"


End file.
